(Closed) Help!!!

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
9919 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’m not sure what to do about your Future Sister-In-Law, other than sit down and have a heart-to-heart with her.  Explain how her actions are making you feel, reitierate that you are excited to have her as a part of your wedding day, and see if there’s anything you can do to help her feelings.

As for the other two – I understand why you are frustrated, but perhaps they don’t understand your expectations.  Bridesmaids, traditionally, aren’t required or expected to help with the planning or help with anything.  I didn’t ask my bridesmaids to do a single thing for me.  They offered to throw a shower and a bachelorette, but it was never pushed upon them. 

It’s hard, but you need to recognize the fact that your wedding will never be as important to them as it is to you.  Try to get on the same page about your expectations, and things will get easier.

As for the gifts – I would get them something nice, but not over the top. 

Post # 3
146 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

Get then each something personal that suits them individually. What kinds of things do they like? Besides the hair and arm tattoos you don’t give a lot of details about them so it’s hard to suggest a gift!

Post # 4
3 posts

View original reply
Missprincessmegs:  you can certainly get that one girl some dermablend (make up that hides tattoos)! Maybe she will get the hint. It sounds like all the reasons I am opting not to have bridal or grooms parties…..drama. you may think about asking all of them to butt out, or you may end up with a lot of unnecessary stress leading up to your big day.

Post # 5
438 posts
Helper bee

lol Definitely don’t gift the Bridesmaid or Best Man with tattoos with dermablend! 

I don’t think you have to give Bridesmaid or Best Man gifts. You can give your Maid/Matron of Honor a thankyou gift after the wedding (and the junior Bridesmaid or Best Man if you want), but it should be presented in private.  As for asking BMs to step down, I think that is a terrible idea under almost all circumstances. No way would it not create more drama and hurt feelings – especially in the Future Sister-In-Law case. Keep the Future Sister-In-Law as happy as you can, because you and she are going to be family and you don’t want bad blood between you over this.

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