- 2 years ago
- Wedding: July 2019
So my fiance and I have been together for 4 years. We’ve had our UPS and DOWNS! He was going to church a lot at the beginning. Hes slowly phased out. We play and joke a lot. Which I don’t mind sometimes, but it sometimes gets serious. In addition to that, his moods fluctuate. Today we can be great. Tomorrow he can wake up on the wrong side and take all of his anger out on me, by just being snappy. Its frustrating. We have more good days than bad, which is what I value most. I enjoy our conversations and the time that we do spend together. But His bad days are so unpredicatble. Our wedding is set for next year, but recently I’ve been having cold feet. I bring in more than him, financially, but I also have a ton of loans that I’m responsible for. Asking him for help sometimes is like pulling teeth. He recently agreed to see a counselor about our issues. Because I do want it to work. Who would want to throw away time.
I just don’t know if I should move forward with this wedding or not. To me its embarrasing because the announcement has been done at work and all my family keeps asking how is planning going. And because of my financial situation, I’d end up living back at home. Single, and miserable. I’ve dated others in the past, but he is really the only person who has actually commited to me, and accepted me for EVERY flaw. He saw me as a wife. And I’m kind of afraid to be single again. A lot of my closest friends are supportive of our relationship, but from what they see on the outside. So I am really stuck on the direction to take. I love him, I do. I see his potential, but I also don’t want to be miserable in a marriage either. I love our great moments together and I’ve gotten so used to him. To all of our couple friends, we are the example couple, and they pretty much all come to us for advice. So I don’t want us to just give up either. But when I think about his moods, I’m like… umm.
I just wonder sometimes, if there is someone else out there. So now I’m wondering if I should wait and see what happens until we go to counseling. Any advice would help.
Oh and the ring, I told him he could spend 100 dollars on something as long as its a style I liked. He decides to spend more on something that his mom liked and is not even my style. I’ve addressed it and he likes to throw me under the bus about it. But if it was me buying him a gift, it has to be EXACTLY what he wants. Kind of unfair.
Oh and for the wedding, his mindset is, its OUR day. So he should get to help choose the colors, which I didn’t mind. But His parents had a big say so in that too.
But please help.