help

posted 2 weeks ago in Relationships
Post # 17
Member
1935 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

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@anonwife:  Bee you feel the way you feel because you’ve been conditioned to.  That’s what abusers do.  Please know that the lost puppy dog act is just that an act.  A manipulation tactic to keep you right where you are.  You already know that if it was just you and he alone in a home the physical abuse wouldn’t stop.  Your children are witnessing this bee.  Can you let your love and desire for them to grow up in a safe, healthy home overpower any feelings of sympathy for your abuser?  Can you let that be your strength to leave?  They’re safety and happiness should be more important than his sorry ass.

You need an exit plan OP and that means you’ve got to get a support group of friends and family and your workplace as well.  I get that you’re afraid so I’ve attached some sources to help you plan your escape.  Please know that shame should no longer have a place in your story.  Your support group needs to know EVERYTHING!

 

https://www.thehotline.org/help/

https://divorcedmoms.com/your-3step-plan-for-leaving-an-abusive-relationship/

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/leaving-an-abusive-relationship_n_5840504?guccounter=1&guce_referrer=aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuZ29vZ2xlLmNvbS8&guce_referrer_sig=AQAAAB7Y46wVUYmFbdSCe1cmGv8y1Zazw6gp4ECCECCmtn5JlkYktdgdZNQfgkmNXCG_M1MvD0P0hKJOzJRQQa7HwTkIbndj2OLSli-be6zSsTRlXKBqWONqamPJm6rjjzLy-IC_LX4JFn9xGGt9H-f4Q58TV7iDaFby5uPOmgVqw4sU

Post # 18
Member
1935 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

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@anonwife:  So I took this little piece from Sassy  as it also pertains directly to you.  Get these and read them.

Two books that I strongly recommend are *Why Does He Do That?*, by Lundy Bancroft, and to prepare yourself for the post breakup phase, Dr Patrick J Carnes’ book on traumatic bonding, *The Betrayal Bond*.

Knowledge is power, Bee.

Post # 19
Member
1935 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

Hey Bee are you okay? 

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