Post # 1
so, i’m getting in married in may to the my stud of a man. i’m so excited, but at the same time i’m pretty nervous. i guess the nervousness comes in, because we’re both virgins–and i mean completely abstinent virgins (no oral, etc). we’ve decided to wait until we’re married, and we’ve been dating for over four years. i’m definitely SO excited to be intimate with him, as the sexual tension is about to kill us. that being said, i’m pretty anxious. we don’t have any experience, and it’s kind of scary to me! i probably sound so childish and immature, but hey, it’s how i feel! so, i’m wondering, experienced bees, any tips/info/tricks/etc that i should know? help me get some confidence!
Post # 3
The first few times, you really don’t want to concentrate on tricks. You just need to spend time with it and getting used to the sensations. Try to relax and not tense up. Make sure to use lots of lube. Afterward, you should get into the habit of peeing (it helps prevent UTIs). I don’t think it’s necessary but it is a good habit to get into.
Post # 4
First off let me say wow! that is awesome! and what a huge congrats on still being virgins! I can’t tell you how many times Mr.Bobby and I have wished we would have waited for each other and for marriage!
Post # 5
Don’t expect too much the first night – just take the time to get to know each other. Come prepared with lots of lube, condoms, etc. He may have to experiment with a few different kinds of condoms to see which works best. Also, if you plan to go on the Pill start early!
Honestly, good sex takes time. Just relax, have fun, and get to know your new husband. Talk about what you both expect on the first few nights now, so that you’re on the same page. Intimacy is all about being open with the other person, so voice any concerns you may have.
Good luck. 🙂
Post # 6
Here’s a post with lots of good tips…
Questions from a Virgin!
Post # 7
Congratulations on your upcoming wedding–we’re month twins! Every person’s “first time” is different–for me, it was pretty painful, but I had a friend whose first was pretty pain-free. Just be ready for anything. My Fiance was my first, and he made all the difference for me–he was patient and understanding when I got a little panicky, and he even stuck around when I started crying (I know, mortifying). So just be patient with each other, it may take some time for it to be easy and fun, and that’s okay! I would bet that the night after your wedding, you’re going to be exhausted, so just take some deep breaths and don’t put too much pressure on yourself. LOTS of lube will really help and LOTS of foreplay. Lots and lots and lots. Enjoy exploring this new part of your relationship!
Post # 8
That being said, it’s not going to be pleasant at all the first time, well maybe if your lucky, it won’t. Start off with just turning each other on and setting the mood. You could ease in with your hands also. If you do buy lube, but DO NOT buy Ky his and hers and all that special sensation stuff, it burns. We tried it for our first honey moon and it ruined it for me. It burned. The mr liked though.
A lot of it comes natural, at least for me it did. Don’t stress yourself, just let it happen.
Post # 9
No real help (these ladies have given good responses already!) but I just wanted to chime in that you don’t sound immature at all. It takes a very responsible and mature person to make the choice you have! I don’t regret not waiting, as I still waited to be with someone I felt comfortable with and we talked about it a lot, but I applaud your decision 🙂
Post # 10
just try to relax and have a good time. my first time with my Fiance (we were both virgins but we didnt wait til marriage) was good but it did hurt and you are just learning about “how” to do it. honestly, my first time was so sweet and nice BUT it did hurt and its def not like you see in the movies…. but practice makes perfect
Post # 11
Have some wine! =]. Really though, take it slow! If you don’t think you’re ready for full on sex the first night, give it a day or two to get used to each other as it is. Since you haven’t done ANYTHING else, it could be super overwhelming. And, there’s no tactful way to say this, if there’s that much sexual tension buit up, don’t expect him to last long! You won’t need any tricks, trust me. Just go with the flow =]
Post # 12
Agree with others take it very slow. My one and only is my hubs too (I was a virgin, he wasn’t,) and the first time was, to be honest, very uncomfortable and not pleasurable at all. It wasn’t painful, just very bothersome and uncomfortable. But we were very slow which really helped physically as well as emotionally 🙂
Post # 13
Thanks so much ladies! I’m still scared, but I definitely feel a little better. Y’all are the best.
Post # 14
Hey, my husband and I were in the same boat as you, both virgins with NO experience, hadn’t even seen each other naked. The night we got married, we played around, he helped me undress (wedding dresses require 2 people!), and we spent time getting familiar with all the new stuff. 🙂 We didn’t even try to have sex until almost the next day. And that was okay.
Take your time, relax, and remember, you have the rest of your lives together, so don’t worry about rushing things. Lube is very important. Having him stretch you a little with his finger (sorry if too blunt) can help a lot too. Lots of foreplay, like the others have said, lots and lots!
Post # 15
I went to a Pure Romance Party awhile ago and they had some sort of spray that you could spray on “wet spots” and it essentially dried them up and they turned to powder that you could just brush off. It smelled really nice too! I wish I could remember what it’s called. I wonder if baby powder might do the same? Anyhow, maybe that would help out a bit with “that” element! Overall, try not to get stressed! Not worth it–You two will both have an amazing time 🙂
Post # 16
Congrats on waiting! Consider taking a sex book on your honeymoon with you! Often sex books have answers that will help you address any challenges that you may face. It’s nice to have a reference to go to for answers to questions that you may not want to ask a friend.