- 8 years ago
- Wedding: July 2011
Ah I don’t know where to start from.
I love my Fiance, but we just got engaged and I am already stressed OUT OF MY MIND!!!
He is from New York…and has been living all over the world for the last 10. He found a good job in NC where he lives now. I live in Texas. I love NC and will be moving there with him after we get married.
He has a BIG family and they all live in New York. I have a small family and they are aaaaaall over the place.
So when we got engaged the next day we started calling family etc. His moms first reaction was “you’re kidding…..(pause)…..the wedding will be in NY…right?” he told her that she was on speaker so she started screaming and being all happy…but thats not the point here. When we got engaged i was SO happy that I didn’t even notice her “you’re kidding………..!””reaction. Actually I still don’t know what to think abt it…so I never really let it bother me (until now).
But anyways so knowing that he has a bigger faily and after he made it clear to me how it would make more sense for the wedding to be near his family I said ok…again I was happy to be getting married to my baby and wanted to make him and his family happy.
Also he made it clear to me that since he is Catholic the wedding HAS to be in a Catholic church. I said ok to that too since my family and I are not that religious anyways so if it is going to make him and his family happy of course I wont mind doing that.
His mom and sisters have offered to help. I am so thankful that I wil lhave somebody help especially since I live so far from where the wedding will be.
What my main problem here is is the fact that they have been forcing their opinions on me very nicely. The reception place seems to have already been chosen and any other reception places I have chosen to go take a look at are either not convenient enough (1-2 hrs farther from the city they want us to have the wedding) or too expensive.
Now I talked to my Fiance today about how unhappy I am with the fact that him and I live in different states (we have been on a long distance relationship for a long time) and wedding will be in a diff state. If I ever suggest that we have the wedding in Texas he starts getting mean and telling me that he can’t make all of his relatives travel so far. I loved this place that was 2 hrs away from the city they want us to have the wedding and he started freaking out when I told him. He kept saying how inconvinient it will be. STILL SAME STATE and he is worried that his BIG family wont want to travel 2 hours 🙁 I have been SO anxious and not happy. Not only I don’t get to be with my Fiance phisically while pllaning our wedding, but he is against anything I suggest (unless it’s something his mom would agree with)
I suggested that we have a very small wedding in NC since that’s where we will be starting our lives together. I also suggested that I move in with him but his church doesnt allow that.
Pllaning the wedding in New York with me being in a diff state and him in a different state is already getting too stresfull (to the point where I am getting phisically ill). Am I being unreasonable for suggesting we move in together and have both of our families travel for our wedding? I really was going to try and make this work and have been very positive abt our wedding, BUT when Fiance started yelling about the fact that I liked our reception to be JUST 2 hours away from where his sisters and mom wanted it I started thinking that this is not fair to me. I can understand it would be inconvenient to make his family travel all the way to texas (where my family is) but a place just 2 hours away? 🙁 I am so upset I don’t think I even want this wedding anymore.