(Closed) Help – Advice on how to address Save the Dates?

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
7276 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

We just addressed them to our friends and then when I talked to them next I just mentioned that Rick was invited as well. If you don’t want to do that I think it is fine to address it to both of them at your friend’s address.

Post # 3
295 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I would either address it to both of them even though they don’t live together or address it to your friend only and then follow your plan for the inner envelopes for your invitations.  The latter strategy gives you more wiggle room if any of the couples break up before you send your invitations.  

Regarding your plan for the invitations, some people will tell you that each adult should receive their own wedding invitation at their own address.  Others have had different experiences, but for me, when I sent separate invitations to SOs who didn’t live together, they both replied on one reply card, so I just wasted money on invitations and postage by sending separate invitations.

Post # 4
5161 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

LAB:  I addressed most “couple” STD’s to the person I was friends with and included their SO’s name on there as well, but sent to my friend’s address.

If people were getting +1’s, I simply addressed it to the person with no “and guest”.

For invites,  I included “and guest” for the people getting the +1’s. 

Post # 8
1772 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

We addressed them to both ppl or friend “and guest” and sent them to our friends. It was easiest to have that clear from jump. Everyone is clear that the plus one isn’t coming if they break up and the name being on the save the date envelope would be the least of the couples’ problems by then. 

etiquette doesn’t have a clear response for save the dates I don’t think, but, for invites, I remember reading that, for couples who don’t live together, you address the invites to the person you know on one line and the bf/gf after a comma or on the line underneath (with no & or “and”). 

Post # 9
45 posts

I agree with previous poster’s advice.  Address the envelope to your friend and her spouse, but just send it to her address.  I would write the spouse’s actuall name though, instead of just “and guest”, which I think sounds too impersonal for a close friend.

Post # 10
1772 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

BBK009:  right, we only wrote “and guest” instead of the name when we were giving a person a guest who didn’t have an SO but could bring a plus one of his or her choice. Whenever the person had an SO, we wrote out the first and last name. Even if we had to ask to find out correct spelling. 

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