Post # 1
Hi all! My wedding is just a few weeksaway and whenideal planning started over a year ago it was supposed to be a beach wedding ceremony with a champagne toast afterwards, no bridal party, no food, just the ceremony….well fast forward and I guess the girl in me wanted something a little more special! Lol we rented a pavilion areTNT thebeach and have a French bakery bringing croissants, quiche and pastries, coffee, afriend is bringing mimosa punch & bloody Mary’s (it’s a sunrise service) I bought tablecloths, made centerpieces and the details keep going! My family and my finance’s family have all offered to help and I declined for a long time not wanting anyone to feel likethey have to work on our wedding day but enjoy it…am I wrong to assign everyone tasks that morning? Giving my mom tables, soon to be mother in law cake table, sister in law favors and decorations…should I feel guilty about this? They all offered…or should I just buck up and pay somebody? Afraid I won’t findsomebody I can afford or that I can’t trust to be there at 5:30 am…what do u all think?
Post # 3
@chrissyweimer: If I were one of your family members I would personally get a kick out of helping you….after all, I’m up already 🙂 I think you should ask them and see what they say.
Post # 4
If they offered to help you, I would for sure enlist them to help. Don’t give them huge tasks, maybe a couple little ones per person.
Post # 5
Lol, count yourself LUCKY you have family willing to help (there are at least a 100 Brides on WBee who would KILL to be in your shoes !!)
Weddings truly are a family affair… so don’t be shy to tell them all YES, I do indeed now need help …
Plus, they all offered to help
BUT I wouldn’t hand out tasks the day of… I’d call em up and ask them in person what they’d like to do to help out (have a list of chores on a list, so you can mark down the names of your Volunteers once you know who they are)
Hope this helps,
Post # 6
I think it’s well worth it to spend a bit extra to hire a day of coordinator who can take care of those details. On my wedding day I want my closest friends and family to be able to enjoy themselves, which it sounds like is exactly what your initial thought was – I’d stick with that, especially with it being at 5:30 AM! The moms should be able to relax and take it all in watching their child get ready for such a special day – not be stressing about making sure the tables are right. Plus they’ll probably be so paranoid about not having it how you want that they’ll ask a million questions, which will drive you nuts when you’re trying to get yourself ready. Where are you getting married? You can get someone to attend to the details throughout the day and the setup and teardown for pretty cheap around here.
Post # 7
That’s what loved ones do, they offer help. Often out of obligation. Honestly I think you should thank them for their offer and then hire someone else to do the work. Do you really want your mother and mother inlaw to be worried about the cake table rather than focusing on and enjoying their children getting married?
Post # 8
I would want my close family members to just enjoy my wedding and spend time with me rather than perform tasks. Sometimes tasks can be given to other family members or friends (for example when I was a teenager I did my cousin’s guest book table). I would not assign those jobs to my mother or sister though as I feel they would want to be enjoying my wedding themselves!