(Closed) help! am i being rude??

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: do i need to invite them?
    no, because your not close to them. : (17 votes)
    41 %
    yes, because your inviting her parents and her sister and her hubs. : (24 votes)
    59 %
  • Post # 3
    1897 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    Hm, I say you invite the whole family with their SO’s, or you invite just the parents.  I don’t think you can invite one sibling and not the other, particularly when you see them all at family functions.


    Post # 4
    8353 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2011

    I agree, you need to invite them.

    Post # 5
    175 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    I agree as well. Either all the siblings need to be invited, or none at all.

    Post # 7
    1566 posts
    Bumble bee

    I agree with the above bees. I understand where you’re coming from, but inviting some siblings without others is an etiquette no-no, and likely to ruin your relationships with all the members of  the family. 

    EDIT: If you invite the one couple that you’re close friends with, that’s fine. So if you don’t have space, ONLY invite the one couple. 

    Post # 8
    4765 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas

    I seem to be in the minority here, but I don’t think it’s a huge deal. If I’m understanding correctly, they’re your SIL’s family, NOT yours. I think that it’s fine to not invite entire families if they are friends. For instance, we have some close family friends that include an older couple and their adult children (who are my parents best friends), but we are not inviting all of the adult children and their families to the wedding because we are not close to all of them. I do not think this is an issue, unless you feel like the other siblings will be upset or offended at not being invited.

    Post # 9
    2289 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2010

    I have to agree (sorry…I know it’s hard!).

    Post # 11
    510 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2009

    Well…In reality it’s probably not a big deal, and even if it is, they’ll most likely get over it eventually 🙂 …What i’ve learned about the “invitation dilemma” as I like to call it, is all the things you stress over about the invites, don’t really end up being a big deal in the end…So if it’s two extra people, I say wait until you get some “no’s” and act like you sent it to them and call to confirm…when they say they didn’t get it, say OHMIGOD…I can’t believe it! I am sooooo sorry…and send them one…if they come great…if they don’t, then it’ll save you some space 🙂 but I would invite them so as not to have any hard feelings…

    Post # 12
    2208 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    Yeah, I’m against the grain as well. This isn’t your family or FI’s family, it is Future Sister-In-Law by marriage both ways family, and you are inviting them because you just like them. This isn’t an obligation invite. I’m inviting the brother of FI’s aunt’s partner because I like him, but I’m not inviting all of FI’s aunt’s partner’s siblings. See them sometimes, but we are so far removed, no obligation exists.

    Post # 13
    5154 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2010

    sorry but yes, I think you need to invite them.

    Post # 15
    2362 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2010 - New York Botanical Garden

    I’m in the group that doesn’t think it’s necessary to invite them, so your inviting them at all is a nice gesture and I’m sure they’ll appreciate it!

    Post # 16
    1897 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    After keeping up with this thread I choose to change my vote!  If you’re that upset about having to extend that invitation, it’s probably better for them if you don’t.  I know that I’d rather stay home than be an unwanted guest! 

    I have someone on my guest that I don’t want invited, but Fiance (and some of his family does), so some people will be happy to see her at least! 

    The topic ‘help! am i being rude??’ is closed to new replies.

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