Post # 1
Etiquette help please!
About 3 years ago I broke off my engagement to my highschool sweetheart. We were well into wedding planning, no I didn’t leave him at the alter, so I had purchased a dress, and some DIY reception/ceremony deco. Just when I had given up on love or ever getting married again, I met my now fiance!!!!
The dilemma is, what are the rules regarding using any of the deco/ideas i had previously purchased for the “wedding that never was”? The DIY supplies aren’t really important to me and I will probably end up not using much of them. However, my wedding dress is my DREAM dress, I LOVE LOVE LOVE it!!! Also, it’s high end and cost me a pretty penny. Thankfully, I’ve been blessed with a financially well off husband to be, so there’s really no wedding budget. Do I go out and buy the exact same dress I have hanging in storage, or do I use the one I already own?
My fiance said whatever I deide is fine with him, and that our wedding day is going to be about our marriage and starting a life together, not the minute wedding day details of the dress, reception, catering, etc….
But, Im an over-analyzer and would love to hear your opinions, or if anyone has been in this predicament before?
Post # 3
I haven’t been in your same shoes, but I’m super sentimental and would not want anything lingering of the other relationship on my wedding day.
That said – I would also not waste the money on buying the exact same dress, just because the old one was bought for another reason. You could think of it as if you bought the dress and the other things for your wedding… and will be using them for your wedding 😉
Post # 4
Never been in your position either, but I wouldnt go and buy the exact same dress. Maybe you should go dress shopping for fun and see if your tastes have changed and if you fall in love with another dress. If not, and the dress you have is still your dream dress, then I would go ahead and use it. Your ex-FI never saw you in it and though it was purchased for that wedding…. if you’ve tried and its still teh same dress you would to.. then its your dress and it was meant to be worn for this wedding even if it was bought for another wedding.
Post # 5
i was previously engaged but never bought anything. he did however propose to another girl with the my ring. hahaha.
its not like you were married in the dress. its your dream dress. wear it! and hey, if he’s well off, why not buy a bitchin reception dress? lol.
Post # 6
Thanks ladies! I plan on wedding dress shopping this weekend again!
Post # 7
@sunshine_kar–the engagement ring proposal reminds me of an episode from One Tree Hill! LOL
Post # 8
I have not been in your position. BUT when I steped into my dress and pulled it up the first thing I said outload to my mother was “FI would Love this dress” So im my case, if somthing were to happen then No I would not wear it. But if you just bought a really pretty white dress and didnt have any of those thoughts then I would go for it.
Post # 9
I would reuse things that were just part of the plan. it’s not like you’ve been married in the dress before. if you love it you love it
Post # 10
If you found the dress that you love, based on your personal style and it is the vision of what you want for your perfect day, then it has no link to the past Fiance.
I think it would be lovely if you kept the dress, and if you have to retain the symbolism in some way, may it be a reminder that all life’s trials and challenges have led you to this moment where you are marrying the perfect man for you in the perfect vision of beauty and leave it at that.
Congratulations, and don’t let the little things like dress/decor create stress where it need not be. The important thing is that you are becoming a wife to a new and wonderful man.
Post # 11
Since you didn’t actually wear it the previous time, it is fine either way. I would wear it.
Post # 12
@misstomrsx2: hahaha. yes! i totally forgot about that. the funny thing is, i just saw her trying to sell it on Craigslist! lol.