Help…..Bad Proposal?

posted 2 years ago in Engagement
Post # 31
1434 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2019 - City, State

Well, the first time my guy proposed, he came in town (he was living in another state), and he made up some bologna about going somewhere without me for some reason. I can’t remember. I knew it was bogus because I believed he was picking up the ring.

Then, he wanted to take me to our favorite sandwich place to eat. Then he wanted to get me my favorite drink, a mocha frappuccino. Then, instead of going to my house, he decided we needed to go to the park where we went at night after our first date.


We walked around there, talking about when we’d first hooked up. Then he decided to go to the car, and I was like WTF??????????


At the car, he went on the driver’s side and then he went on my side to let me in. But he didn’t let me in. He started saying all kinds of sweet things that I don’t even remember now because I zonked out, realizing he was proposing because he had a jewelry store gift bag. I kept telling myself to listen, listen, listen, but I couldn’t retain a single sentence. I should ask him if he remembers. LOL

He didn’t kneel. He handed me the WHOLE package the ring came in. Gift bag, everything. Even the receipt was in there. He asked me. I said yes. I opened the gift bag, took out the ring, and I gave it to him. He looked all clueless, so I extended my left hand. We hugged for a long, long time, and then he kissed me.

During the proposal, I confess. I had a few seconds where I was like, “Really? this is the proposal?” But it was only fleeting. The proposal was perfect for me.

Now, we did NOT get married. 6 years later, and I don’t care what kind of proposal he does. We have a new ring on the way. I assume this time will be just as quirky, memorable and perfect for me. Oh, I still have the first ring, too, but after what we went through, I told him that I was getting a new ring. Better believe it.

Post # 32
3832 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

I think people are being a bit harsh, a proposal in a car park after asking you to ‘shack up’ in the back of the car (!) isn’t exactly anyone’s dream. I also don’t like the insinuation that women should just shut up and be happy if their partner deigns to propose to them, no matter what. 

Nonetheless, people have pointed out a lot of positives, and it’s quite cute that he just couldn’t hold onto the ring any more! My cousin’s husband proposed when she was just out of the shower with wet hair and all, and it’s a cute funny story now. If you feel bad telling people, then honestly just come up with a little white lie if that helps. It doesn’t matter if they know the truth or not. 

Pushing the wedding date back is a bit more worrying… he can still do ‘personal accomplishments’ after you’re married. You’ve been together 11 years, just get it done already!

Post # 33
1040 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

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bridetoneverbee :  He was talking so fast because he was probably nervous. He probably spent a while beforehand getting himself psyched up to do and things didnt go to plan but he was probably just excited to propose because he loves you! Life isn’t perfect, take the bad with the good. Our proposal wasn’t perfect but it makes a funny story!

Post # 34
539 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

View original reply
bridetoneverbee :  My proposal wasn’t great either, my husband (boyfriend at the time) had a date night planned for us and was determined to do it on that night. The night was going HORRIBLY, I was in a terrible mood after being in hours of traffic driving home from one of my classes, I was starving, the restaurant we went to gave the smallest portions ever so I was still hungry after eating, it was an expensive place so he couldn’t afford much more food. I was cranky the entire night. When we got back to his house from dinner, he proposed. He had beautiful flowers waiting for me and what he said was sweet but the whole situtaion just wasn’t the way I would have wanted it. I actually talked to him about it because it bothered me and we’d be having a very long engagement because I wanted to finish my degree and get a job first. He agreed that it’s not how he wanted the night to go either, he just felt like he couldn’t wait any longer because he told people and had the ring for a few months. He told me other times he thought about doing it, which I would have LOVED, but he said he kept feeling like he could do better and then he just couldn’t wait any longer. So that really helped me understand. Even though the proposal wasn’t “what I wanted” our marriage is everything I wanted and more. 

Post # 35
274 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

Bee, the proposal doesn’t matter. What matters is that you both want to get married to each other. Plenty of people I know had the glamorous and picture perfect proposals, but their relationships end up failing. 

I had a low key engagement. It was at his apartment. We laugh about how casual he looked on that day. Honestly, when you’re married, none of it matters. 

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