(Closed) Help Bees! Issues with my bridesmaids!

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
1488 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I would just subtly let them know that you are going to make your own decisions based on what you like. I didn’t ask my BM’s opinions on anything. Not even the dress I picked out for them. I just showed them a pic and told them when to have it ordered by and how much it was. It may sound harsh, but I do it that way specifically to avoid drama. I like to make my own decisions without any input because I always follow my gut and don’t want to cloud my own judgement. Just stand your ground!

Post # 4
Member
46421 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

You took them with you shopping for a wedding dress . That implies that you wanted their opinion. You don’t necessarily have to agree with them. If you don’t want their opinions, don’t ask them.

They probably think they are being helpful by offering suggestions re centerpieces etc.There are many bees on here who are complaining about the opposite situation- no one will give an idea or offer to do anything to help.

You said you are letting them choose their own dresses. You can put parameters on their choice- e.g short, sleeveless, send them paint chips of a color etc so that they end up with a dress that also suits your vision.

Post # 5
Member
61 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

You think you should be more bridezilla?  If you said it is ‘my day’ one more time I was going to throw up.

Post # 6
Member
5296 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 1993

Personally, I didn’t get my BM’s opinions on much beyond their dresses. And I disagree that they are welcome to voice any opinion at your dress trying-on. They are there to support and encourage you – and help you find what they like. So it shouldn’t be ‘well I hate that about that dress – it should be how do you feel in this dress, what do you like’ – it’s not about them. If even the manager noticed, then they were going too far.

Hope things get better!

Post # 7
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I went dress shopping with just my mom. I always think its best to just take one person who really understands your vision. I’ve never liked shopping with my girlfriends because they always give me weird opinions about it in the store but they always love what i’m wearing if we go out. Some people cant see your vision until the outfit is put together.

Post # 8
Member
5296 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 1993

@tovaford12:  oh come on now, that was a bit harsh 😉 It is her day and it sounds like her bridesmaids are being a bit too pushy and need to be reminded that they are there to support the OP – not dominate.

Sister relationships are always complicated and if they are older, they’re probably used to bossing around the OP.

Post # 9
Member
5296 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 1993

@bells: Yup. I went with my Maid/Matron of Honor, mom, and Bridesmaid or Best Man once, had an aunt and family friend at another……and only when my mom and I went alone did I find it.

My Maid/Matron of Honor had a COMPLETELY different idea than me and hence hated whatever I liked and I hated her pics.

You need to take someone who will push you to find what you want – not what they want or think you should want.

Post # 10
Member
61 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I’ll meet her in the middle hisgoosiegirl, I WAS being harsh and she was already on her way to being a bridezilla. 

It is her day to get married, but they have to wear the dresses.  If they aren’t happy with the dresses this is only going to get worse.

 

 

Post # 11
Member
1488 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I think we’ve all had our bridezilla moments. I know I sure have! And afterall, it IS her day 🙂

Post # 12
Member
61 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

There went that lunch…

 

Post # 13
Member
5296 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 1993

@tovaford12:  as far as the wedding dress deal – the sisters need to back off. And as far as Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses – saying they are ‘typical bridesmaid dresses’ is not helpful at all. They could have said, hey I was thinking more of this style or hey, let’s try this store.

I guess I feel when you agree to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man, you technically might just end up wearing a dress the bride picks – without input from you. That’s part of the deal!

But it sounds like all of them should take a break for a little bit before anymore feelings get hurt 🙂

Post # 15
Member
1488 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@Ashley_B: No need to apologize to anyone. Like I said, everyone has their moments. I’ve had a couple freak out moments too. Hang in there girl!

The topic ‘Help Bees! Issues with my bridesmaids!’ is closed to new replies.

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