Post # 1
Member
11 posts
Newbee
hey,
my fiance and i have been dating for 3 years, and got engaged in 2010 then we found out that my fi sister got engaged early 2011 and decides she wants to have her wedding a week after ours in 2012 because family members coming in on flights dont have to make another trip that year or next year for her own wedding time. I was furious…i understand her reasoning but it is not like there is no option for another wedding date at christmas time or the following year or later in the year when family members could come out again. we had set our date since 2010 and feels like she wants to do this without thinking about us and giving us consideration. I spoke with my fmil about the issue that if i cant change the date then at least they could move it to the week before our wedding because that way my fi and i can go away on our honeymoon without fitting out her schedule. so the dates set….6 days before our wedding. now the nice fun part i find out…shes having the same weddingn colours as us…and we cant say she didnt know because i told her our colours once i asked her to by my bridesmaid! geesh…just venting….do not know what to think about this issue….dont want to be selfish ….dont want to be pushed around either.
Post # 3
Member
533 posts
Busy bee
Hmmm.. I don’t know what to tell you really. I can understand you are frustrated.. but it’s not like it’s the same day. And I do think that she was thinking of family members who have to travel a great distance. Now there is a better chance your Fiance will have more family members there because there are 2 family wedding close together.
What I don’t understand is why you would want her to move her wedding to the week BEFORE yours???? When I started reading the first thing I thought was “at least it’s not the week before”.
Post # 4
Member
1843 posts
Buzzing bee
That does stink, but I agree with Miss Smurf, I would have preferred their wedding be AFTER yours, not before. You could have waited a week and then taken your honeymoon.
Post # 5
Member
11 posts
Newbee
@milesbella:lol…i was starting to think whether i shot myself in the foot for having her move it from one week after our wedding date to one week before ours.
Post # 6
Member
2053 posts
Buzzing bee
@heatherdelight: That is frustrating, but don’t let it get to you too much. At this point, try to keep the rest of the details of your wedding to yourself. Just cite superstition or that you want to keep the rest a surprise. 😉 Hang in there!
Post # 7
Member
1046 posts
Bumble bee
There will always be a bride with the same colors as you.
Post # 8
Member
11 posts
Newbee
@Cornflakegirl:thanks…thinking that is my best bet to share things with her…despite the fact it will be hard to because she is one of the bridesmaid…do i just tell her where to show up on the day of? lol
Post # 9
Member
11 posts
Newbee
@futuremrshc:yeah i know…i dont own the colours…but i thought it would be a consideration in picking colours on her part.
Post # 10
Member
533 posts
Busy bee
Perhaps she was being a little insensitive in picking the same colours as you – especially if she knew what your colors were going to be. Do you think that either of you will change your mind on colors?
Post # 11
Member
11 posts
Newbee
@Miss Smurf: i feel a little stubbornto change it because i had picked these colours since late 2010 and hasnt changed my mind about it and my fi and i love the colours. the sad part is i spent an hour with her looking at different dress styles with that colour of mine i wanted, that i dont feel that its me who should change…before she got engaged and set the wedding date.
Post # 12
Member
533 posts
Busy bee
Yeah… I can see why you are frustrated with her. And I think it will be hard keeping things from her because she is in your wedding party. Do you think if you spoke to her about the worries that you are having she will change? Perhaps if you tell her that you are worried about the weddings being too similar, and throw in a line like “we both want our days to be unique and reflect our individual preferences” she will change her mind or re-evaluate what she wants.
Good Luck!
Post # 13
Member
11 posts
Newbee
@Miss Smurf: i absolutely confrontation…i was thinking that my fiance does it because it is his sister and that if their is feud that its between family…and its easier to fight with a sibling and get over it than soemone being married into the family…:S plus i would nto put it past her to make a scene to the family.
Post # 14
Member
11 posts
Newbee
hate confrontation i meant. oops.
Member