Post # 1
Hey ladies…so we found a venue and are considering a couple of dates. We have a couple of friends that we would really like to be at our wedding who are getting married in the same “range” of months (ie late Aug, mid Sept and mid Oct). Based on this, we are doing what we can (by choice- not by guilt) to pick a date where these important people who will be recently married won’t be on their honeymoons. So that being said, it narrows the date range and we are considering a Friday evening wedding.(Dilemma enter here) His “most significant” ex gf got married this past year in early October and that is one of the “prime” dates in our range. So the question is “will it look bad/create a stir if our wedding is the same day/month of his ex’s the following year?”. Ugh this is so much darn work and I can’t tell if I am being ridiculous or accurate in feeling like this “looks bad”….(yes, I know it is “our” day but please people, put yourselves in our (ok more so MY shoes…)). HELP!!!
Post # 3
It wouldn’t even hit my radar, go for it!
Post # 4
This never would have even crossed my mind!! Do you have a lot of guests who went to this other wedding?
Post # 5
I don’t think anyone will notice (except maybe his ex). The date we want is the same as a couple we know (but 2 years later). I felt a little weird at first, like we were “stealing” their anniversary…but they don’t own the date or even the month!
Post # 6
Part of why it crossed my mind is that she and her husband live close by to us so we see them out fairly regularly and yes, do run in some of the same general circles however that being said I can’t think of anyone who went to hers that we would invite to ours. Valid point- thank you ladies!!
And the other thing is that despite me being nice to her (ie offered her a ride home from the bar one night when she and her now husband got in a fight and he left her there) if we do happen upon them out and about, she continually glares at me and refuses to ackowledge me with even a nod/half ass smile (and no, I have no desire to be her friend, I just don’t see the point in being rude to someone you don’t know)…..I get the feeling she’s still got some “what if” feelings toward my SO…..
making me think that she will be all over the details of our wedding through mutual sources and start talking if she catches wind of it…
Post # 7
If you avoid that date because it’s “hers,” aren’t you then assigning too much significance to her and her life? Why should either of you care? If you go ahead and use that date, it’s because she and her date are not even on your radar. She is in the past and of no significance to either of you.
Post # 8
this is why I posted this ladies 🙂 Thank you for the feedback- “Neva” that is a ridiculously valid point! 🙂 thanks!!
Post # 9
Your wedding date has nothing to do with her – pick the day that works best for you!
Post # 10
The first date I thought I’d want is actually my aunt and uncle’s anniversary. I’ve since changed my mind, but originally she told me to go for it. 🙂 People don’t care. There are only so many days in a year, and I doubt anyone will even notice.