Post # 1
My Future Mother-In-Law wants to invite (5) of her friends who were so condescending to me, and have insulted me in the past to the point that I had to take therapy! (yes! seriously.) We have 300 guests and 75% of our guests are already from their side of the family, and I’ve been very accomodating to that. So now, since we said NO to the (5) friends she wanted to invite, she made this WHOLE DRAMA! that she won’t come to our wedding! and she doesn’t want to have anything to do with our lives! SERIOUSLY! ;( I thought that was disrespectful of her. She chose her friends over her first-born son!? Wow. HELP PLEASE! what should I do!?
Post # 3
I am having some Future Mother-In-Law drama myself. That being said. If you dont have a close relationship with these people then I would not have invited them. The fact that they hurt you so bad emotionally as to send you to therapy is bad enough. Why would they even want to come to the wedding. I would politely tell her, I am sorry you feel that away but that is your choice. You can either be there for your son or stay at home. Im not forcing this choice, you are. She is basically disinviting herself. If she wants to be childish its not up to you to placate her. In the beginning you have already accomodated most if not all of his family. You should also tell her that the remaining guest will be of your choosing.
Good luck and I hope things get better for you.
Post # 4
Call her bluff.
“I’m sorry you feel that way. We’ll miss you at the wedding”.
Post # 5
Stand. your. ground. Seriously. This type of manipulative behavior has no place in adult relationships. Make sure your Fiance is backing you up and you are both willing to be clear on the fact that this is her choice, not yours.
Post # 8
Yeah call her bluff, that’s just a ploy that she’s used before with your fi and it’s probably worked. Just have fi tell her how sorry he is that she won’t be there. She’ll probably hold out for a little while but if it’s not brought up again she’ll come around. She’ll be dying for it to come up over and over while she’s waiting for someone to beg her to come. I have had mil trouble for years and have stood my ground,while my sil hasn’t and she gets bossed around and told what to do while mil has a healthy respect for me. ( at least once she realized I wasn’t going anywhere)
Post # 9
Let her make this choice. It’s good for you. She or her idiot friends won’t be there to ruin your mood.
Post # 10
I’m in the same boat with Future Mother-In-Law drama. Future Mother-In-Law told Fiance she isn’t coming to our wedding either b/c her boyfriend in not invited. It’s going to hurt Fiance and they’re just being childish. Send an invite anyway and it’s up to her to decide whether or not her son is important enough to choose over her friends.
Post # 13
I know someone who did with a Future Father-In-Law. FFIL showed up anyway and apparently seemed to have a good time.
Post # 14
She is a grown woman. If she chooses no to attend that has no reflection on you. Stand your ground, be polite, but don’t invite peoople that hurt you so badly. It will put unnecessary stress on you and a damper on your big day.
Post # 15
@LR2012: Bingo, call her bluff.
Post # 16
@TexasSpringBride: Thanks! This is making me sad ‘coz I do want her to be in the wedding. I just don’t understand her way of thinking… ?