(Closed) Help! How do I let my guests know what to wear (invite wording)

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 4
10851 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

I’d put it on your wedding website and let it spread by word of mouth as well. It worked well for us with our outdoor wedding (I had a cousin who wanted to wear jeans and his wife nearly killed him!).

Post # 5
2607 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

I would put it after “Dinner, dancing, and lemurs to follow (so please wear your Sunday best!)”  That sounds a little corny, but something similiar would let them know to dress up a little bit, but that it’s not full-on black tie.  You can also elaborate further on the website you’re directing them to, if you wish. 

Post # 6
399 posts
Helper bee

IMO, the picture on the invite says it all (ps- adorable!) but u also have it on ur website, so I think that should be good. I wouldnot include anything with the invite unless u are already putting in some kind of info card, in which case something simple like “formal wear is encouraged, but not required” or “black tie optional” might be good too. And for good measure,sues some word of mouth to pass it along!

Post # 7
380 posts
Helper bee

If you’re worried about it, I’d definitely suggest adding a note on the invite. You can add it to your website too, but I think more people are likely to see it on the invite. You can just say “Cocktail Attire” or something along those lines, at the bottom.

Post # 10
5890 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2012

i would definitely put something on the invites as well as the website.  we said “Cocktail Attire” on the invitations, and then had a link specifying suits and cocktail dresses for ladies, as well as letting them know that the ceremony and reception was on grass and outdoors, so dress accordingly.

Post # 11
1104 posts
Bumble bee

We put Dress: Cocktail on our invites for the same reason 🙂 I think a lot of people appreciate the heads up!

Post # 13
8435 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Honestly I would find it a little condescending to be told how to dress. It would make me feel like the Bride and Groom have a problem with how I (or others) dress daily and felt so compelled to comment on it. like they think I or other guests might embarrass them!

I consider myself adult enough to know how to dress for a wedding. I usually use the invite as an indication of the formality of the event and it hasn’t failed me yet. If anyone is confused I am sure they will ask someone!

Post # 14
30 posts

@j_jaye:  Yeah, but some people aren’t that clever. It would be a shame to assume that people would figure out what they should wear, and have someone show up in jeans and a tshirt because they didn’t ask. I’ve seen it happen. People can be stupid.

Post # 15
8435 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

@Sputnik:  I understand that but should you possibly offend every other guest so that one person doesn’t show in jeans? And does it really matter what a guest wears? Shouldn’t the important thing be that they show up to witness the marriage and celebrate with the B&G?

Persoanally I didn’t even notice what most of the guests wore to my wedding and aside form our parents/siblings I can’t recall exactly what anyone wore and it has only been 5 months!

Post # 16
424 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Muckenthaler Cultural Center

On our website we an included a “what do I wear?” section

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