- 5 years ago
- Wedding: October 2013
Our ceremony venue holds 125 max. Half our guest list will be flying in from overseas (mostly FI’s half). When we went through the guest list, we carefully went through his half with both him and his family to estimate how many we thought would fly in. If we weren’t sure, we were conservative and assumed yes. This brought us to about 120, which we felt comfortable with.
However, then my mom wanted to add a few family friends we’d forgotten. I told her I wasn’t comfortable bringing that 120 closer to the 125, but I would put them on a “b-list” (cringe, I know!) and if we had enough no’s from the people we assumed were yes, then I would invite them. I always thought B-lists were so tacky, but this wasn’t the first thing that I’d encountered in wedding planning that I had to change my mind on. So, B-list it was (mistake #1)!
Fast forward four months later and invites have gone out. I emailed my mom (all this was done on email due to our time difference – we usually only talk to on weekends) and asked her for one of the couple’s addresses. I wasn’t ready to send the invite (not enough no’s yet!) but I didn’t say that, so that was mistake #2.
She emailed me back later and said “okay, I emailed them for their address and I’ll let you know when I hear back.” Oh crap! I assumed she had their address already, so I didn’t realize she was going to ask them for it. I emailed her back asking if she’d told them why, and explained I wasn’t sure yet, I just wanted to be ready. She didn’t respond for two days, but then this morning I got an email saying “Okay, I messed up. But I’ve emailed them now and said we weren’t sure just yet, but we would know in a few weesks.”
WTF?!?!? So she told yeah you’re invited, what’s your address? Then emailed them and said just kidding, now you’re not, but you might be?!?!? Kill me now. I am beyond embarrassed!!!
So what do I do? I know I shouldn’t have had a b-list in the first place, I get that so I don’t need to be lectured! I made a mistake and I regret it. Moving on… 🙂 But do I now email the guest and apolgize? Or do I pretend this never happened and just send the invite asap? And what about my mom? I’m pretty ticked off at her, but I don’t think I really have much room to lecture her when I made a mistake as well. But then on the other hand… who frickin’ does that?!?! I don’t get how in the world she thought it was okay to email them and say “nope, now you’re not invited”????