(Closed) Help I don’t know what to do!

posted 8 years ago in Catholic
Post # 3
825 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I’m not catholic but i’m not sure if they “believe” in divorces, so I’m not sure if you can get married in a catholic church. I’d say call a local church or search online like google. Good luck!

Post # 4
458 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

You cannot get married in a Catholic church unless you have your previous marriages annulled.

Sorry to tell you that, but you can still have a gorgeous wedding! Good luck!

Post # 5
1418 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I think you should look into Catholic churches in your area and start attending if that is what you want.  Perhaps even schedule a meeting with the Priest there if you have questions.  If you attend on a regular basis, you can then look into baptism, if that is what you choose for yourselves and your children.  It is never too later to find your faith and if you believe in the teachings of the Catholic Church, then I think you should find a church to attend and go for it!  

The other ladies are correct though – the Catholic Church does not believe in divorce.  I do not know the details about that, so you may have to check with the local Church or diocese to see what your options are.

Best of luck in your journey 🙂  

Post # 6
2006 posts
Buzzing bee

I’m not Catholic either, but from my understanding you can still get married in the Church, although it takes paperwork and contact with the Ex’s.

However, things might be different if neither of you have converted to Catholicism yet. There are plenty of Catholic bees on the board that I’m sure will help you!

Post # 7
825 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I tried to do some quick research online because I was interested too. I’m not sure, but it sounds like you need to contact a catholic church and they might have to have a meeting about it and something about your first marriage needing to be annulled or something. They said the process can be lengthy so depending on when you want to get married, I’d start soon.

Post # 8
722 posts
Busy bee

Her first marriage was not in the church-so according to the Catholic church it was not a real marriage. Therefore no annulment would be necessary. 

In order to convert and then be married in the church there will be many requirements. It is certainly something you can do, but it won’t happen overnight. You may have to wait awhile to get married. I would suggest talking to a priest right away.

Post # 9
445 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

One of you at least will have to become Catholic to be married in the church, and likely both of you will need annulments of your previous marriages. I really think the best thing to do is find a priest and talk to him! Explain the situation and ask his advice – he will know better than any of us.

Praying that all this works out for you!

Post # 10
3176 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I believe you can get married in the church but they won’t recognize it as a sacrament. If you want it to be considered one you both need the marriages annulled.

Post # 12
2 posts
  • Wedding: June 2011

Have you thought about the Lutheran Church.  The beliefs are very similiar.

Post # 13
464 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Good luck with your search for a church, and with your wedding plans! I agree with Cakegirl. If your previous marriage was a civil ceremony, and not in any kind of Christian church (Catholic or Protestant), you should NOT need an annulment. This seems to be the OP’s situation.

The Catholic church recognizes marriages between two Catholics and marriages between two Protestants as being valid if recognized by the marrying parties’ church. Therefore, if you were married in a church, you will likely need an annulment to marry again (or, more technically from the church’s standpoint, to marry at all- since an annulment means your previous marriage was not valid).

These same things are important to consider for your new husband’s previous marriage, as well.

The best thing to do is to contact your local church and ask, as it sounds like you are doing. The priest and marriage tribunal will be able to help you.

Post # 14
80 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

@ MrsMiller2Be – Are either one of your baptized and/or confirmed Catholic? If so, then there should be no issues with getting married in a Catholic Church. However, if you guys are not, then you would have to go through RCIA to become baptized and confirmed into the faith. From there, you would be able to start the process of getting married in the Catholic Church.

Does this throw a hamper into you marriage schedule? Sure, to some it may appear so. But, if you look at what you are asking the Church for… which is one of the most Holy Sacraments, then you may then realize that it is all worth it. There is nothing better than to be married in GOD’s house and have HIM fully present in the Eucharist.


Post # 15
2867 posts
Sugar bee

1) You must attend RCIA (Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults) to become a member of a parish and be baptized/receive first communion.  Contact a parish closest to your house for details.

2)  You will be confirmed as they put it next Easter.

3) You need to meet with a priest and discuss options to have both marriages annulled.

4)  You need to meet with a priest for pre-cana (pre-marital counseling).

5) You need to accept the decision made by the tribunal (I think that’s what it’s called) based on if your previous marriages for either you were valid.  They don’t grant annulments easily, and rarely do.  If they find that your marriage vows were not valid when you two married other people, then they’ll grant an annulment.

You can still become a member of the parish; however, you will have to be sure to attend Sacrament of Reconciliation (confession) and not marry this guy until you have the annulments.  RCIA is a valuable class, it’ll explain Catholicism.  However, if you want your children to be Catholic, just start attending Mass.  Don’t receive Communion( Eucharist), get your children baptized and first communion, then they’ll go through confirmation at age 14.  These things should be discussed with your parish priest.  Good luck!

Post # 16
1025 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I think that you only need an annulment for a Catholic marriage.

It sounds like God is working in your heart and that’s why you are pulled to this. Really explore it, and don’t let the divorce thing discourage you. He’s a forgiving God, from what I hear. 


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