(Closed) Help I need wedding guest advice!!!! PLEASE

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
4712 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

It’s his responsibility to convince them to invite you.  If they decide you can go, just go.  Be the bigger person.  And stop bringing up the “whore” situation.  Just act like yourself… and act like nothing happened.

Post # 3
890 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

sumshine.dawn:  i agree with damara jade; stop bringing it up first of all. a wound can’t heal if you keep ripping it open. you’ve apologized and clarified, but for some reason they’re still butt hurt over it. that’s not your fault. good for your Boyfriend or Best Friend for standing up for you…i don’t really have any advice except, if you want to, go to the wedding you’re invited to (which, 2 weddings…really?) and for him to do the same, since it is his own brother after all.

oh and be sure to thank your Boyfriend or Best Friend for having your back. he sounds like a keeper. 🙂

Post # 6
1887 posts
Buzzing bee

I think they are being very immature.  Other than that not sure what to tell you.  You should be invited and the fact your Boyfriend or Best Friend is at least trying to stand up to this immaturity is nice.

Post # 8
2945 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014


sumshine.dawn:  Since it is your BF’s family, I think you need to respect his wish one way or another in how he decides to interact with them.   You have made your opinion known that while you are not happy about not being invited, you think your Boyfriend or Best Friend should still go.  If you Boyfriend or Best Friend doesn’t want to go at that point, let him stick up for his decision. 

Post # 9
901 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2014 - 11/15/14-Vineyard

How do you get him to go? You don’t. 

You can’t force someone to go somewhere they don’t want to. If he does, he will most likely be miserable it seems without you. If he doesn’t want to without you, don’t force it. It is HIS decision. then both of you are taking a stand together and will be there for the second one. 

Post # 11
7357 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

This is your boyfriend’s dilemna, not yours. You’re not invited and you’ve already said you don’t want to pay for the plane ticket to just sit in a hotel room. Fair play. Now your boyfriend should decide if he would rather go to the wedding alone or not go.  There should be no negotiations or coaxing his brother to invite you.  If your boyfriend declines, then the couple need to accept that they set the situation in motion by excluding you. 

Tell your boyfriend to decide what he wants to do, then do it.

Post # 12
594 posts
Busy bee

Scarlett11:  Yes, it’s an awesome gesture that her Boyfriend or Best Friend would rather not attend than go to an event at which his partner is not welcome. That speaks volumes about his character.

sumshine.dawn:   You can’t win in this situation, and their immaturity is not a reflection on you. It’s probably better for everyone if you and your Boyfriend or Best Friend do not attend.

Post # 14
297 posts
Helper bee

sumshine.dawn:  have you talked to your bf’s parents about this?

if you’re as serious with your bf as you say, these people need to realize you WILL be family for life! are they going to be this immature at every holiday/event?

Honestly I would just crash the wedding- what are they going to do, have a bouncer kick you out? lol and cause a scene in front of 250 people and seriously burn bridges with your bf? I don’t think so. You are family and deserve to be there.

This bride is seriously setting you up for a lifetime fued and you need to just show her you’re not a wimp.

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