Post # 17
I just thought of something else that may not be propping… she may be having one of the other children doing your son’s feedings which could explain why there is such a mess, I’ve heard of that happening at a home daycare in my town – the woman had too many kids and had the older ones taking care of the younger ones!
You should certainly report her asap! The last thing anyone wants is for her to be putting children in danger, if you put it off one of the children could be injured or worse (god forbid) in her care.
Post # 18
No matter if they’re licensed or not, my kids will NOT go to an in-home daycare. And never one with only one person in the room with more than one child. You see, I was once put in a licensed in-home daycare.
I got nasty burns on one of my hands through the providers’ negligence one day (never leave hot stuff where kids can reach it – especially if it’s boiling hot!), and she just rinsed my hand in cold water and wrapped it in a towel for the rest of the day (8-9 hours). It was green when my mom picked me up that evening. I had to spend the night in the hospital and my hand is still scarred; because of it, I went from being ambidexterous to only using one hand to write, and have trouble with manual dexterity in that hand because it was so badly injured.
Remove your son from this situation as soon as possible. Seriously. It’s dangerous, and you don’t want to look back later and think that you could have prevented this sort of injury to your son (or worse, since your son is an infant and can’t fend for himself).
Post # 19
Hi everyone….thank you for all of your replies.
We are and have been looking for other options since Monday. I live an hour away from my mother who just retired and we may have her come next week or my husband will have to take the week off. I would, but I can’t, I’m a teacher……which is why all of this is BREAKING MY HEART!!! I could never hand over a child I have had all day in the condition my son is in without having a VALID explanation OR without feeling like a complete loser!!!
Yes, she is licensed….she gets away with so many because her husband is licensed also so they can have double the amount allowed. The problem is that he works nights and is SLEEPING during the day while she tends to all the kids. Seems like she’s just trying to rake in more $$….especially with the under two kids bc they are the moneymakers with the highest tuitions.
I do know DEF that there is a 7 month old and a 14 month old with my 4 month old. For all I know, she could have another little one on a day I haven’t been there to pick him up. The laws in my state are 2 under the age of two, so with both licensed, they aren’t TECHNICALLY breaking any laws.
I haven’t confronted her about this. My husband asked that I don’t do that for fear that if this is how she is taking care of him in a normal situation, what would she do to him if we offended her in some way? I can’t bring myself to confront her, because I am a hot-headed Italian who can really lay into someone. I have tried to give her the benefit of the doubt and even self-analyzed me….am I overreacting? I am being one of “those parents”? I don’t think I am and it seems you all agree with me. Thank you for being my sounding board and for offering all of your comments. I appreciate it!
Post # 20
But the law is “2 under the age of two” TOTAL. Like, no more kids other than that.
She has 3 under the age of 2, plus 5 or 6 more kids. There is no way in hell that is in ratio, even with her husband.
We were a 1 to 4 ratio for under 5-year-olds.
If she has 3 tiny ones, plus 6 more kids that is 9 total, and she and her husband are out of ratio.
I wouldn’t take him back tomorrow, not for even one more day. Call in sick, do whatever you have to do.
Post # 21
Not. Cool. You are absolutely not overreacting.
Post # 22
I would report her and pray they do a welfare check. She doesn’t have to know you did it.
Post # 23
Get him out of there, pronto. You’d never forgive yourself if he came to any harm and quite honestly, the likelihood of this happening is HUGE. I’d also seriously consider not using an in-house childminder but a decent day care nursery that has a good reputation.
Post # 24
@MusicBee76: oh no that sounds awful! 🙁 he should not be going home messy and i would bet your hunch is right. i’m a nanny and it makes me so sad to hear that! is there any way you could afford a babysitter/nanny? if you can find a good one it can really be such good quality care for your little one as opposed to daycare… they can stay at home and on their own schedule, not be exposed to all the illnesses at daycare, and recieve good quality one on one attention.
either way, i hope you can find a different situation for your little guy! hugs!
Post # 25
I think there is way worse than bottle propping going on in that daycare.
The second you can pull your kid out, I would have a state licensor sent in to check for other regulations being broken.
Post # 26
Trust your instincts, mama! If it doesn’t feel right, it’s not right. Do what you need to do to fix it, even if it’s really inconvenient for you for a little while. Keep that baby safe, and be a mama bear if you need to!
Post # 27
That sounds totally not okay. I have been thinking about you all evening. If I were you, I would ask your husband to call in sick tomorrow and stay home with the baby. Then I would go to your principal or head teacher and explain the situition– you thought you had a good day care situation, but it is clearly not safe. You are working to get another day care provider lined up and your mom will take over starting next week, but you really need Friday off. If you don’t have leave, can you take it unpaid?
Then talk to all of the teachers and parents to find recommendations. It will be challenging to find someone, but I am sure it will work out. I absolutely would not send the kid back there.
Post # 28
@MusicBee76: I am a teacher, was a nanny and had worked at two different daycares and I would never leave my child with a woman who had that many kiddos running around. Despite if it is illegal or not, I would not send your little one back. There is absolutely no reason for you to be picking him up in that condition, nor for him to be in that condition for so long. I am so sorry you are going through this!
I 2nd talking to teachers and seeing if they have any recommendations. Also, I have (and so have many parents and friends of mine) used sitter city to find jobs/hire nannies. They have a background check on there too. Just another option.
Good luck and I know making sub plans is sometimes more trouble then just going in, but maybe if you can swing a halfday or something to look at places and/or meet other possible daycare providers ya know? Good luck!
Post # 29
Oh hellzzz no! Hopefully you can find another daycare ASAP and then report her. Seriously—I am pretty sure the licensed adult has to be awake, upright, and ambulatory when caring for kids! Also, how did you find this person? If it was through a review site, mommy group, etc you should warn them, too.
Post # 30
I agree with the PPs that you need to find another daycare ASAP. I would also do some serious research into the licensing requirements of infant/toddler centres in your state/province. Where I am for an infant/toddler centre, the ratio is 1 to 4. There is no excuse for your child being that mesy when you pick him up.The care providers should be cleaning up after him regularly.
As one of the other PPs mentioned. Trust your insticts. When you are looking for a new centre, you should be able to ask for the licensing reports of the centres that you are interested in. They might be posted on-line (some are), but others you might need to request the information from the licensing agency.
Another thing to consider, (at least in Canada, I’m not sure about the US), there is a HUGE difference between licensed centres and unlicensed ones. Licensed centres are regularly checked and have an extensive list of of licensing requirements that they need to follow. Unlicensed centres are just that, unlicensed. This is supposed to limit the number of children that they have in their care, but that’s not always the case.
Post # 31
I don’t think all home daycares are terrible and shouldn’t be all lumped together. There are lots of home daycares that do a great job and really care about the kids.
In this case though, it definitely doesn’t sound that way.