- 2 years ago
- Wedding: October 2018
So heres the jist. I have been with my husband for 10 years and married for 6. He has one older brother who has been the black sheep of the family and just a disaster, he was the guy who was a hotshot in school and still trying to live that life. My husband is the opposite. Hes a doctor an amazing man just loves me and our two sons. He is responsible and the perfect guy.
Him and his brother obviously dont get along very well and my situation with his brother doesnt help their relationship.
Im going to give a brief break down because i could write so much.
1. When i first was hanging out with my husband before we were dating i met his brother. He took my number after a night out once when we were figuring out where to meet up after (my husband his gf and the two of us). So i got a text one night. Now background for me is im very conservative. My husband was my first and my family never spoke of sex or anything. But my DH’s is not this way. They all openly talk about sex, make jokes etc. Anyways back to the texting. He sent a message asking what i was doing if i was with his brother because he was looking for him. I wasnt so i said no. Im not sure how it went sideways but he made some inappropriate joke but wanting to be cool and not the lame sheltered person ive grown up as i jokr back. Then he said something like “want to come like my lollipop”. And i realized really quickly he wasnt joking, so i told him he was going too far and making me uncomfortable. He freaked out called my phone 6 times and i didnt answer because i freaked out i didnt know how to handle it.
I didn’t mention anything and avoided Brother-In-Law like thr plague and when i had to be around him he didnt say anything either so i was glad to be donr with the situation.
2. A few years later BIL’s gf and i became really close and we went and stayed at their house. We played a drinking game and i got really drunk and really warm so i went to get fresh air. I laid down on the deck and Brother-In-Law came out sayinf he was going to smoke. He then kneeled down but over me asking if i was okay. This was summer and i was wearing a tank top and i have rather large breasts so whenn i was laying down it just was not appropriate. So i told him to move sbd got up and went back inside
3. Since thes3 instances he hated me. He started regularly fighting with me in family situations. Calling me names, just becoming an asshole. I spent the next 6 years dealing with him behaving this way. I tried never being around him but couldnt be avoided.
4. Then we got married and Brother-In-Law drinks a lot so i was worrief about his behavior. However he behaved and was happy with everything he was being kind again and nice to me. Towards the end of the night he came and grabbed me gave me a hug and said welcome to the family, we share he winked and laughed i laughed too because i mean obviously its a joke.. and then when went to walk away he slapped my ass.
5. Then it was Christmas 2 years later. We were drinking once again im wondering if thats just the issue now. But ill go one. My Darling Husband went to go smoke with my Mother-In-Law. His cousins were in the kitchen. Brother-In-Law comes up to me and i was dancing and laughing with the 6 year old cousin. He told her to go for a minutr so she did. He came upto me and grabbed me again and said that i married the wrong brother that i should of been with him. That he was in love with me. And then hugged me and said im going to touch your ass and then went i walked away he slapped my ass. I took this as him joking he said he was joking. But it left a really bad taste for me so i told my Darling Husband. Which of coursr pissed him right off and thry already had a strained relationship due to how crsppy he treated me. My husband confronted Brother-In-Law and he said h3 was just joking around messing with me and i took it out of context. This was christmas eve
6. The next day we were all hanging out and he was drinking and i avoided him because i was just uncomfortable. Then he msde a V with his fingers and like he was licking it basically the sign for oral sex. I was shocked and said thsts not funny stop it infront of everyone he laughrd and was lik dont be sensitive
7. A month later we were all at his moms house she lived 3 hours away snd it wss her birthday. We stayrd the night snd his broth3r came the next day. I usually sleep in my panties and he cmae into my Darling Husband room to get him so my Darling Husband wanted to shower quick so he was in there. Brother-In-Law said lets go we need to decorate. I said i need to dress and he smiled and then walked out. When we got downstairs he kept complementing me being actually nice.. and then said dont worry im not hitting on you.
Thst comment confused me. I thought maybe now i was making a mountain out of a mole hill. That im so sheltered and hes so open that i dont get it. I feel like i need to sit down with him and tell Brother-In-Law that enough is enough. He is making things weird. Even now sometimes he will just stare at me.
Am i wrong by not telling my husband about every situation. Is it just thst hes an alcoholic so hes drunk doing this and just acts inappropriately because of that. The conversation christmas eve really got in my head and i just cant shake it. And if he loved me like he said why did he treat me so poorly so obviously he doesnt and this is to screw with me.