Post # 1
So here’s my problem… My mom and dad got divorced when I was 2, so I hardly remember them ever being together. My sister and I would see our dad every other weekend up until we turned 13 or so. I was never really close with my dad. After that we only saw him on holidays for the most part. My mom got remarried when we were 12. (I’m 21 now) I have since then become very close with my stepdad. He seems to care and contribute to my life a lot more then my dad ever did. So now I am getting married on new years eve and I’ve been contemplating on who should walk me down the aisle. My mom and stepdad are paying for the entire wedding and my dad isn’t paying for anything. I don’t want to upset my dad (I know that it will if he doesn’t walk me down the aisle) but I would really rather my stepdad walk me down the aisle. What should I do? I’m thinking I will let my dad walk me down the aisle and let my stepdad have the first dance? What do you bees think? will it hurt my dads feelings too much?
Post # 3
I was the Maid/Matron of Honor in my bestfriends wedding she had the same situation what she did was have her dad walk her half way down the isle and then from there her stepdad walked her the rest of the way. When it came time for the dance she danced first with her ste dad and then her real dad cut in a finished the dance they seemed to be okay with this as they both had a big part.
Post # 4
Have you considered walking down alone? That way you wouldn’t offend anyone.
Have you talked to any of your parents about this?
I think this is a sensative situation and you’re right to be careful about it.
If you’re dad had been a total deadbeat I would say absolutely have your stepdad walk you down the aisle, but it sounds like your dad has had some sort of active role in your life, and because of that I think he gets to walk you down the aisle.
I think that a good solution may be to have a first dance with your dad and a first dance with your stepdad, or to have one of them cut in in the middle of the song.
Maybe you can honor your stepdad in more subtle ways. Does he have some kind of handkercheif or trinket you can carry with your bouquet? Does he have a “something borrowed” or “something blue” that you can wear? I think honoring your stepdad more subtely will save a lot of hurt feelings and unnecessary drama.
Post # 5
thanks, that might work too! I just don’t want to hurt anyones feelings over this 🙁
Post # 6
I like @rebecca_wcc:
‘s suggestions Have your Dad walk you down the first half of the aisle ( as he did for te first part of your life) then have your step dad take over.
Post # 7
I understand she was the same way her real dad wasnt a total dead beat he just wasnt there much and her step dad was they paid for her whole wedding. He real dad was okay with it she made it work she just talked to them befire hand.
Post # 8
I have considered walking down alone but would prefer not to. I have talked to my mom about it and she doesn’t really have an opinion on it apparently. She would be fine with either one. You’re right, my dad was in my life and he wasn’t a deadbeat dad so I can’t just not have him in the wedding at all. I think the best option is to do a first dance song with both of them and like you said honor my stepdad in some other way. It will cause too much drama to not let my dad walk me down the aisle