HELP – MAJOR PRE WEDDING ANXIETY SEVERE PRE WEDDING JITTERS

posted 3 years ago in Engagement
Post # 2
Member
3072 posts
Sugar bee

Doubts about your relationship are NOT related to your anxiety/depression. There’s something else going on. 

Post # 3
Member
5457 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2017

View original reply
maria4ever202 :  

anxiety is so hard for people to understand when they haven’t dealt with it.

I can’t answer your questions about your relationship, Bee, but I can tell you that anxiety is nasty, brutal, and it really warps your thought process (I was diagnosed with gad about 8 years ago but I can date it back to my childhood)

Have you experienced anxiety before? Your wedding is two weeks away and stress is normal and to be expected. But anxiety magnifies everything. It can turn the smallest decision, the smallest occurrence or problem into some major crisis that seems impossible to get past.

I can’t tell you if you love him. But I CAN tell you to give yourself a break. Relax. Cancel unnecessary activities and focus on you and your relaxation. Go for a massage. Focus on deep breathing exercises. Download the calm app which has meditation exercises. Take a bubble bath. Pamper yourself.

I am not writing any of this off, if you make relaxation your number one priority, you will be able to think clearly and sleep again. And lack of sleep makes anxiety sooooo much worse.

Don’t make any major decisions in this state, get yourself calmed down and relaxed and go from there.

And if you’ve dealt with anxiety before, start getting treated for it.

HUGS Bee.

Post # 4
Member
5457 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2017

View original reply
mrsaime :  

There is really no way for you to know that. Anxiety seriously messes with your head.

Anxiety makes you question everything you’ve ever known and when I first started dating, I would throw up after every mile stone and I would lose weight.

Not because the relationship was wrong, but because I had an undiagnosed anxiety disorder

Post # 5
Member
666 posts
Busy bee

I also have anxiety and depression. It sounds like your anxiety is running rampant combined with some doubts about your relationship. Can you get in to see a professional before the wedding? It may be nice to have an impartial party to give you feedback.

Post # 6
Member
3072 posts
Sugar bee

View original reply
Sansa85 :  Just 30 years of experience.

Post # 7
Member
5457 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2017

View original reply
mrsaime :  

With an anxiety disorder? Or a bad relationship?

I don’t see how you can tell her it’s her relationship that is wrong and not her anxiety.

I think she needs to get herself calmed down and start sleeping again before she can see if it’s anxiety or the relationship.

I don’t make big decisions when my anxiety is in a heightened state because my thoughts are based in anxiety and not reality.

Post # 9
Member
5457 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2017

View original reply
maria4ever202 :  

Have you tried other techniques to control your anxiety? I know people are against meds, I can’t understand that myself, but therapy has helped me immensely along with the meds. 

Post # 12
Member
5457 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2017

View original reply
maria4ever202 :  

anxiety is difficult to understand if you’ve never experienced it before, your family means well but the they might not understand how anxiety messes with your head.

I know it’s not as simple as “just relax” but try the calm app. There is a science to deep breathing, it slows your body and your mind down.

also, keep up the therapy, especially right now. You need it now.

Post # 13
Member
2968 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

My personal opinion is that you should really consider the medication. I also have anxiety and depression. I’m on an antidepressant and it has made a huge difference. I still struggle with anxiety. It’s not like I take a magic pill that makes me all better. However, without the antidepressant my anxiety is debilitating. It really messes with my enjoyment of life because everything is tainted with anxiety. 

You’ve gone through a rough time with graduating and not getting into law school. Maybe you just need to take the medication for a short while to help you through this difficult time. I’m not suggesting you take something addictive—steer clear of something like Xanax (I’ve made the mistake of taking that in the past). I’m saying find a doctor to give you something nonaddicting. 

It’s good you have a therapist. Is the therapist teaching you skills to help with anxiety? I also have found a lot of help with self help books on anxiety. The combo of antidepressant and learning coping skills has made my life much better. 

I can’t give you any answers on whether or not you should get married. I just suggest you keep on trying to get help for your anxiety and depression because it sounds like you are really suffering. 

Leave a comment


Find Amazing Vendors