(Closed) help me be ok with a baby name I don't like

posted 7 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 32
Member
2902 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@dreamocracy:  I feel like people will think I think I’m Scary Spice or Gwennyth Paltrow. It’s one of those names people will either love or hate you know? Also, as cool as my Fiance is and as slightly left of the middle I am I worry my boy may be a shy book worm who gets picked on for having a funny name. If he is confident then he will be fine but if he’s quiet and shy? He might struggle with that name.

Maybe I’m over thinking it though 🙂

Post # 33
Member
894 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

As a person with an unusual name, I can say that I have always loved having one. I can’t say whether a boy would put as much thought or importance into their name as a girl would (I think generally girls care more about their name than boys do) but I do think that regardless of gender, it’s nice not to be the third Amanda in your class, or the third Jeremy. It’s nice to be different than all of your peers in some way, to have something that is just your own that you don’t have to share with other people. Your name is part of what defines you, what you are and I think it’s a lot more special when you aren’t friends with two or three or more other people with your exact name. Oh and I can also say that I don’t think unless you named a child something that had obvious bully potential (like if it rhymed with a sexual organ or something, lol) you would have to worry about negative attention coming from it. It’s getting a lot more common for people to stray away from the top 20 list when it comes to naming their babies, so it’s not unusual anymore to meet a kid with a name that would be considered different. Growing up, I got nothing but compliments for having a name so unique, it was really cool 🙂 My name is Quiera, by the way.

 

That’s the best advice I can give to you, really and just something to consider.

Post # 34
Member
514 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

So, my friend and her husband were at odds naming their baby boy throughout the ENTIRE pregnancy.  She wanted Liam, he wanted Joseph.  Finally, after she went through labor, he relented and let her name him Liam.  He was like, “hey you pushed him out, so you can have your name!”  Maybe you’ll get your way in the end?!!!

Post # 35
Member
2268 posts
Buzzing bee

I second the posters with the options of Logan or Cohen in place of Cohen. Still similar, but much more ‘known’ (and nicer IMO).

OP, are there any names you like? Not love, but names you think are okay?

Post # 36
Member
292 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I think unusual names are fine, as long as they are real names, not made-up names, or names of things instead of names for people. I have an unusual name, but it is the spanish version of a pretty common name. I love having a unique name and can’t imagine sharing my name with someone else. I’ve met 3 people in my life with my name, and I like it that way.

Post # 38
Member
2902 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@marjojo:  Just go with Cogan then. I really don’t think we can help you. Just because people like unusual names does not make them obnoxious hipsters.

Post # 39
Member
9679 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I think Cogan is okay, although my favorite boy name is Colin so maybe I’m slightly biased on that. It’s an unusual name but I don’t really think it’s that “weird” or whatever.

And maybe you’ve already done this, but have you ever gone to ancestry.com and looked up names from both your families going way back?

 

Post # 40
Member
868 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

If you want to like Cogan, you eventually will. The significance of the name will be there once he’s born because it will be HIS name. I’m conceeding to my husband on our baby boys name because he pulled the “it’s really important to me” card and he NEVER does that. It’s a wildly traditional name (his father’s) and while I don’t love it, I don’t hate it either.  I think that this might be one of those situations where it’s a HUGE deal now, but when you look back on it in 6 months or so, it’ll feel silly that you were this worried about it.

Cogan will be whatever your son makes of the name- if he’s shy, it’ll fit. If he’s outgoing, it’ll fit. Children are resilient and as long as you’re not naming him Crap Face Jones or something he’ll dictate what the name “feels” like.

It’ll be FINE and in a few short weeks you’ll have a fabulous little boy in your arms:)

Post # 41
Member
6739 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

I think you’re overthinking this and have way too many rules.  Go with whatever sounds right and won’t have your kid made fun of in school.

My grandfather passed away when my mom was pregnant with me, so she gave me Josephine as my middle name because he was Joseph.  Then when she was pregnant with my younger brother, he came to her in a dream and told her that she was pregnant and going to have a boy (she didn’t even know she was pregnant) and so she decided to name him Joseph.  There’s nothing weird or unusual or stupid about it.

I also think it’s not attention seeking or obnoxious to have a unique name.  I want my kids to have unique names because everyone is unique and maybe you like to fit in, but your kid might like to stand out.  It was always nice having a name that no one else had and I never got confused when someone called out, “Hey, Lindsey!” and 16 girls turned around. 

If your husband is really attached to his middle name and wants to give it to his future son and it’s not a name you hate, then I don’t see the problem.  Give your son the middle name that you like for the girl and if you end up having a girl, give her the female version as her first name.  It won’t be weird or stupid or awkward.

Stop over thinking it.  Just make sure you don’t name him something stupid like Phillip Phillips or L-a (pronounced la-dash-a). 

Post # 42
Member
7430 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

How are we supposed to help you? How would we know what names would be meaningful to you, which you admit is your main issue?

Post # 43
Member
5891 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

@marjojo:  I haven’t read the entire thread, but how far back did you go in your family to find a name? There has to be some great-great- uncle with a name you like.

As for unusual names, I have a rare, old fashion names and I love it. I rarely meet anyone with my name and people def know who I am (which Jennifer are you taling about? Marketing or Engineering?). Now that is different if you have an silly unusual name like Blue Ivy or Apple–yeah people are going to talk about that.

Also, why dont you come up with 3-4 names you dont hate and wait until you meet him. My friend took 2 weeks to come up with a name because they wanted to get to know him before selecting a name.

Post # 44
Member
8957 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

marjojo

I agree with @twofortheshow.  I also kind of roll my eyes at names that scream “my progeny is just too too special for a ‘normal’ name!” but that’s not the case here at all. First of all, the name is not some bizarre alternate-universe spelling of a “real” name, it’s not some random object or abstract adjective, it’s your beloved husband’s middle name! You’re not hipsters who are trying too hard, or celebrity wannabes looking for a spotlight. You’re proud parents who want your child to share a meaningful name with his daddy. Regarding backstory/justification/etc — if anyone asks “oh, where did that name come from” you have the perfect answer: it’s his dad’s middle name. And if it just happens to sound cool too, well that’s not YOUR fault!  🙂

I was going to say the same thing about using your dad’s name too — you don’t know if you’ll end up with a girl or not. And if you do, it would NOT be stupid to have them with male and female versions of the same name. I know two siblings who have the male and female versions of the same name as their FIRST names. It’s not stupid or cutesy. It’s just their names. They both treasure the origin and feel bonded by it. It’s something special that they share. 

I think once you see your son in person and say “Welcome to the world, Cogan” the name will become beautiful to you.

Post # 45
Member
8957 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@MRSLMA:  Dibs on Crap Face Jones as a band name!!!  Sorry, I called it.

 

Laughing

Post # 46
Member
1880 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I have to admit I am not one who has trouble with finding boys’ names I like. I love practically all of them. Girls’ names, on the other hand, zomg so hard.

I think you’ll be fine with Cogan. Yes, it doesn’t sound as great as a name could. But it does have a lot of meaning, it’s a family name, etc. And while he may get some questions about it, he has the killer “it’s a family name” comeback, which is much better than “my parents made it up to show their uniqueness.”

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