(Closed) Help me choose my last bridesmaid – Cousin or Friend?

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
10 posts

Are your other bridesmaids friends or cousins? I think that even though it’s your special day, avoiding excluding only one person from a certain group (i.e., friend group or cousins) is probably best long term. 

Post # 3
63 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

Why is it not an option? 

Have the people you love and want to be with you stand up there. No one cares about uneven numbers. 

If you truly must have exactly four bridesmaids, then I think you need to stop focusing on external factors like who has kids or whose husband has anxiety. When you think about looking back on your photos in 5 or 10 years, who do you want to see beside you?


Post # 4
5995 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

View original reply
whitebridetobee :  Cousin, hands down.

You were her Maid/Matron of Honor. To not put your Maid/Matron of Honor even in a party of 4 is a bit of a slap in the face, in my opinion. I’d say leaving your engagement party at 9pm is a pretty minor offence. (Maybe I’m getting old, but midnight is a pretty late finish for an engagement party). I doubt she’d leave your wedding significantly early. Her husband will know other people there (and anyway, she can sit with her husband after the formalities). And she’ll always be in your life.

Fitting into the bridal party group is irrelevant because they don’t need to do much together.

Post # 6
1758 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

Pick your cousin for sure, she’ll always been your cousin and you were her Maid/Matron of Honor.

As for leaving the party, let it go. You don’t know why she left early, she could have had a migraine, the runs, a bad week at work and felt like shit. You don’t get to dictate to other adults how long to stay/how much fun to have at a party and she probably didn’t want to burden you with whatever the reason was. 

Ask you last Bridesmaid or Best Man and stop stressing! Enjoy yourself! 

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