- 5 years ago
- Wedding: August 2013
This may be a long and complicated post, but its a decision that MUST be made and we haven’t been able to make it so far. we need help.
Where to have the wedding.???
I’m half turkish and half persian. I grew up in Canada.
Fiance is lebanese, grew up in Dubai and Canada.
We have family in dubia, lebanon, turkey and iran. No family in Canada except for my parents who can travel.
My dad’s side is bigger, so most of MY family is in Iran. However, I don’t want my wedding in Iran and I am much closer to my mom’s side. Moreover, although I have alot of relatives in Iran, they are able to afford travel and have told me they would be willing to go to either lebanon or Turkey. This rules out Iran.
Both Fiance and I are not interested in wedding in Dubai so this rules out Dubai. The relatives in Dubai usually vacation in Lebanon every summer, and since the wedding will be in August, they will likely already be in Lebanon.
Fiance has a large family in lebanon with about 65 guests considered immediate family that his parents would like at the wedding. If the wedding is held outside of lebanon, only his parents and brothers and maybe a few uncles will be able to attend.
Turkey is my moms side of the family and the people I’m closest to. My immediate family is small. Originally I was told by them that it would be difficult for them to travel but today they said they would. However, my family in turkey would have financial constraints and I would be paying for airfare for my aunt, her husband, 3 cousins, grandma and grandpa if the wedding is not held in turkey. My extended family would not be able to travel and i would not be able to assist them as that would blow my budget clear out of the water.
My dad is indifferent about location. My mom tells me to do whatever will make me happy, but also keeps suggesting one wedding in turkey. I think this is the way she has dreamed about it for a while.
Also tell us to do whatever will make us happy, but fiance’s mom has researched a ton of venues in lebanon and is perhaps assuming that it will be held there, again, i think this is what she has dreamed of for some time.
Me and Fiance:
My dream wedding would have been in istanbul, but that isn’t where my relatives live anyway, so that just doesn’t make logistical sense in any way. I love the idea of doing something in turkey but i also think lebanon is beautiful and that it might be less stressful for me if we do it there because fiance’s mom who travels there often would help me with the planning. And they have the best hairstylists/makeup artists in the world there. however, i don’t want my mom to be dissapointed
Fiance tells me that he’s open to whatever, but he’s quite family oriented and I think he will be dissapointed if his extended family cannot cheer him on. it’s hard to get a straight answer out of him.
As you can see, this wedding is very family oriented – we both care alot about the families and making them happy….
1. largish wedding in lebanon : Iran side will travel. Turkish side will travel with my financial assistance. Will make fiance’s family happy.
2. largish wedding in turkey: Only immediate family from fiance’s side will attend. I won’t really care about anyone outside immediate family but it will make my mom and mom’s side happy
3. Two small weddings – Lebanon and Turkey – This will mean that only us and our parents will travel to both locations. Downside : it will be VERY tiring for us on a limited time schedule ( 2 weeks for weddings and honeymooon, travelling from Canada) and may eat away at our honeymoon.
4. ELOPE (lol, not really an option but i do fantasize about it)
What would you do?