(Closed) Help me, help me! Kids at the wedding?????

posted 9 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Call the guests. Maybe they thought you made a mistake. Say to them, “hi! we received your rsvp for my sister’s wedding in October. However, I see that you RSVP’ed for your children, also, and I wanted to call and clarify that it’s an adults-only reception”

They’ll probably complain a little. And then you just say, “I’m sorry, this is the bride and groom’s decision and children are not invited to attend” If there’s a reason (ie the wedding is by a lake, it’s very late, it’s in a casino, etc etc that would make children attending ‘inappropriate’, feel free to state so here). If not, you’ll get some backlash, and you can always say, “oh, i’m just the messenger, but yes, children are not allowed for any of the guests and no exceptions will be made”. They can be mad at you all they want, but it’s not your wedding, so they’ll likely not get too extreme or beg or anything. That is, if your sister and her husband aren’t up to the task of calling back all 50%.

“Room constraints” is a good one. The wedding hall simply won’t fit 200 adults plus 200 kids, right?

Post # 4
276 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I agree with the above post.  I think you should call the guests and say you’re really glad they’ll be able to make it but clarify that’s it an “adults only” reception.  I also think people will probably complain a little (that’s just natural), but it’s better to make it clear beforehand rather than kids showing up on the wedding day and you having to deal with it then and there.  Just explain to them that because of money, location, etc., you had to limit it to “adults only.”

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