- 7 years ago
- Wedding: November 2014
Additionally, I will not be having a double wedding-it’s tacky, IMO. My sister and I are two different people, with two different tastes. While doing them the same weekend may work if we lived closer, we live a 10 hour drive apart. I want to get married where I live so my friends can attend and it is easier to oplan and my sister would like to get married where she lives so her friends can attend and it is easier to plan. Thanks for your suggestion.
My vote is for May 2014, although I don’t think you should get too fixated on the cuteness of the date or the rain even (unless you are set on being married outdoors, in which case I completely understand that aspect).
How about the Sunday of the Columbus Day weekend next October (2014), if that is commonly recognized where you live? That might be a good second option…
I do think that even 6 mos between you and your sister might be too close/expensive for people to travel…and with it being close to the holidays too…Have you talked to your family about your concerns? What do they say?
26 mos engagement is long, but feasible…and will help you save up more $$ and be at ease with the planning process…
I talked to my sister and parents about it and they said that 6 months should be the minimum amount of time in between the weddings with travel being so expensive for everybody. My sister is worried that some people will go to my wedding instead of hers because my wedding is in San Diego (a vacation destination), and her wedding is in a rural town called Farmington (where there is nothing to do).
A 26 month engagement makes logical sense, but I’m impatient and I’m not getting any younger. Plus Fiance and I are waiting until we get married to get a place together, and paying extra rent for an extra 6 months isn’t going to help us save anything. But if I don’t figure it out soon and book the venue then everything will be booked already and I’ll ahve to push it back.
makes sense. I’ve always wanted to go to San Diego! Where I’m from, Columbus Day weekend is a holiday weekend…and the weather here is unpredictable (and so worrying about the rain will make you crazy!). Your ideas for your wedding sound great…
Where are your guests traveling from? All over? Or are they concentrated in one particular area? If so, would you consider doing a destination wedding closer to where they are at? Just a thought…
What about November 1? Is that an option? That way you can do a Saturday, but still the earlier week..?
I live in LA, and I think the chances of wedding-canceling weather in San Diego in the first half of November is plenty slim to be safe. I think worst case scenario, you’ll have to get some umbrellas, which would be adorable in a garden wedding. But I went to Zuma beach in Malibu in late November last year, and it was a little chilly, but beautiful, not a cloud in the sky.
I think for your situation and vision, a Sunday wedding in November would be lovely, and if it comes down to November 2nd and 9th I think you have to decide whether a cute date is enough to tip the scales of DST vs weather, or if you already have a preference. But you might have to let go of a number you like and accept that the anniversary of the date you got married will always be special. I had originally wanted June 21st because I love the number 21 and liked that it’s the summer solstice, but we went with the 28th for logistics.
Unfortunately you have to accept that you may have family who will choose between your wedding and your sister’s, but it’s not your fault that you both want weddings where you live and you live somewhere objectively more exciting than she does. I think late May is a more attractive time for people to travel, and Saturdays are a little easier, so I think the score is pretty even.
Have you spoken directly to any of your family in Hawaii about this?
To answer your question, we seriously considered Hawaii- it’s obviously a popular place for a destination wedding, I was born there, my mom and grandparents, aunts and uncles live there, but I can’t imagine booking a venue without making a visit to Hawaii and I don’t know when I’d be able to make a trip to Hawaii. I spoke to my grandmother about it- traveling is hard for her so I thought about bringing the wedding to her and she said it should be in California so that more of my friends could attend. I know my closest friends would do their best to go to my wedding even if it is in Hawaii, I think some actually want me to get married there so they can visit, lol. I guess it’s still a possibility.
I need to come to terms with the date thing- it’s just hard when you had a certain date in mind for a long time. My sister was supposed to get married June 2013 instead of May 2014 but then she became pregnant and had my amazing niece this December so we are juggling a bit. I need to view it as getting another anniversary, instead of losing the anniversary I already love. We thought about doing October 25th to keep our 25, but pushing it back a week would save us at least $2,000 so it is hard to justify.
I have talked to my mom and grandmother (both live in HI). They seem to think that 6 months is enough buffer for people to save for it if they really want to go to both and some people will be in a financial situation so that they likely won’t be able to attend either so waiting isn’t going to help (I have an uncle who is an artist, and I love him, but he doesn’t get to travel to the mainland often and probably won’t be able to attend either wedding, for example). Obviously, everyone isn’t going to be able to make it on any day.
The other crazy thing is that my cousin (on my mom’s side) looks like she will be getting engaged soon, and then we may have 3 weddings in 1 year for the Hawaii fam (and we are the only grandchildren in the whole family). My aunt (who drives me crazy anyway) suggested that her daughter get married a week before or after me in November. So picking a date has been a bit of a nightmare for me. But I’ve decided not to deal with that until it actually happens for my own sanity.
The topic ‘Help me pick a date!’ is closed to new replies.