(Closed) Help me pick my bridesmaids

posted 12 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
735 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2009

I had trouble making this decision myself. We had put a 2-BM limit at first but i now have 4, its not worth hurting anyone’s feelings. I would suggest just asking all of them but… if not, L1 for sure, A would be good to have around because she is around a lot and she know’s your fiance well. then its up to you.

Good luck!

Post # 4
9 posts

L1, R and A

is what i would consider because L2–seems like if you didn’t ask her to be a bridesmaid, her feelings wouldn’t be hurt since you are also not part of her bridal party…

but if you are also considering things like—dresses, having them plan a bridal shower, etc… i would think about their personalities, and who you would like to be around as you get ready in the day getting dressed/makeup etc. 🙂



Post # 5
38 posts
  • Wedding: May 2007 - Wynbrick Center - a historic mansion in my hometown.

Assuming you’re about the same amount of ‘close’ to each of them, I’d just think about who will be the most supportive and least stress-inducing.  Are any of them a bit diva-ish?  I probably wouldn’t include her, if so.  You won’t want to be surrounded by that on your wedding day.


You’re so lucky to have so many wonderful friends from which to choose!  I agree, too, that if you’re trying to narrow it down to 3, I’d elminate L2, for the reason that Heatherq mentioned above. 

Post # 7
116 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

I also agree that it sounds like L1, R and A are the closest to you out of the four you mentioned.  I think having "newer" friends is fine — great, in fact, if they’re who know the "current" you and are supportive of your relationship with Fiance. I think the friends we make now (out of school, settled a bit more, in a long-term relationship, etc.) are those who will "stick" longer because we are more secure in the person we are and the person we will be in the future.  

I have a similar situation with an L2 type of friend — we were so close in college, and talk as much as we can now, but not nearly as much as we used to.  She just got married, and had only family members in her bridal party.  I was engaged before her and I was originally torn when I thought about if I would ask her to be a bridesmaid or not, because we’re not as close as we used to be (and due to distance, she really doesn’t know my Fiance that well), but when she chose to only have family in her Bridal Party it validated my decision to not include her.  I still love her and hope we’re friends for many years to come, but I knew there would be no hard feelings if I didn’t ask her, and the people who ARE in my bridal party are those who know me and Fiance as a couple better than anyone else.  I think this is a really important factor in who you choose.

Good luck! 

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