(Closed) Help me please

posted 9 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
Member
426 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

Ultimately this is you and your FI’s wedding, so have it where you both want to have it.  No matter what it seems like some people will have to travel…  

 
It shouldn’t matter what other people think of the venue (yes its nice to have help deciding, but sometimes it is worse to have to many opinions).  Its should be whatever you and your Fiance want.
 
have YOUR dream wedding……  not your family’s dream wedding….
 
Hope that helps…
 

Post # 4
Member
161 posts
Blushing bee

What about somewhere in the middle?  I think it’s about a 5 hour drive from Chi town to Indy..Consider somewhere in between so folks each go a couple hours. I know that may sound crazy but it would be a compromise.

If that won’t work, pick the place where you and your Fiance have the most friends/memories.  People you love will come. 

Post # 6
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Hi! I agree with kazoochair. I think it would be a great compromise to try and pick a place in the middle. In fact, my cousin just got married and his new wife’s family lives out of town while our side of the family is from the South Side of Chicago (or southern suburbs). They wed in Itasca so that it would be easier for her family to attend while not making it terribly inconvenient for his family. It worked out great and they were both happy that their respective families could attend without difficulty. Ultimately, however the decision is up to you two.

Post # 7
Member
4480 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch

Do what’s most convenient for yourself. Everyone else will make it work. 🙂

Post # 8
Member
141 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

Have you talked to your parents about it? Maybe they aren’t opposed to having you getting married in Chicago and things would work out. But if you want to get married in Indy then you should talk to your fiance about it and see what he says. Good luck.

Post # 9
Member
2641 posts
Sugar bee

How many people in your family?  How many in his? Where do your friends live? Will your parents be willing to have it in Chicago?  (I know they want to see the venues, but does that mean definitively that they want it in IN?)  You could line up some vendors, and have them drive in for a couple of days to meet them. 

Ultimately, if they are paying, and have certain demands, you need to be prepared that you might have to it in IN.  (It’s fine and good o say it’s your wedding, but if they’re paying….) And if you are looking for a smaller wedding perhaps that would work in your favor, because some of FI’s family might not come. (I know large Italian families.  He’s probably not close to all of his cousins….)  I could see having the reception someplace in the middle, if the distance was a bit closer.  But to have everyone drive 2 1/2 hours to get to the wedding kind of sucks.  Either everyone will have to spend the night, or your guests will go home early or get there late, or both.  Also what’s half way between Chi, and Indy, to hold your reception?

Post # 11
Member
368 posts
Helper bee

That sounds like a pickle! Me and the Fiance (and his family) live in NC, but my family and friends are in MN, and we are planning to eventually live in MN…. so we decided to get married in MN, however we DID consider having a destination wedding for a few months…. We also have thought about having a 2nd reception back in NC (but it was too outside our budget to plan two parties.) Maybe think about it and decide what is going to be your best option. My advice for planning a wedding different from your current physical location is to PLAN, PLAN, PLAN!! Utilize every resource you have, friends, family, other vendors, wedding websites and word of mouth. Book early, and plan a few days to go knock out a bunch of stuff at once. We went back to MN about a month ago, and had an engagement party, met the officiant, saw and booked the ceremony/reception site, met the photographer, florist, and I even found a dress (with mom and sister in tow) – being organized and strategic has been the best thing for me for planning, thus far.

Ultimately, you both need to be happy where you get married and I agree with the other bees – your loved ones will travel for you, and everyone will want to celebrate your day. Congrats!! 🙂

Post # 12
Member
2470 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

We have a VERY similar situation! I’m from Upstate NY and he’s from Philly (appx. 3 hours away). My family is very small but his is HUGE! To top it off we got engaged while we were living in DC, but now we are living and planning our wedding from CA! (Still with me?)

Ultimately, weigh your options. For me it came down to knowing that those who want to be at the wedding will find a way to be there, no matter where it is. We wentwith Upstate NY since its my hometown, my sisters are there to help since I’m planning from a far, its the least expensive option and its just one day.  i agree with above posts, loved ones will travel. 

If you opt to plan from a distance, I’ve been blogging about my experiences as a long distance bride to be at http://crosscountrywed.blogspot.com

Post # 14
Member
2470 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I think that’s a good idea too and that is why I chose my hometown… I knew the area and had a good support there. Good luck in your planning!

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