- 6 years ago
- Wedding: November 2011
I have been doing volunteer work with an organization where I’m at overseas. Every couple of months they do a “volunteer appreciation” thing. This month we’re going bowling from 4 pm-6 pm since most are women and they have to pick up their kids from daycare. So I tell Darling Husband about it and this is what I get:
Darling Husband:”So can I go too?”
Me:”I don’t think so b/c it’s for volunteers and it’s being paid by the organization.”
Darling Husband:”Well that sucks!”
Me:”But it’s over at 6, so I’ll be home by the time you get off of work.”
Darling Husband:”No that isn’t what I was talking about. It sucks b/c I’m always turning down happy hours with the guys from work b/c they don’t want wives there.”
Me:”That’s not exactly the same…this is over at 6, it’s free, and it doesn’t involve drinking until 3 am.”
So then an argument starts. I’m not sure exactly WHY? But Darling Husband seems to think it’s the same thing. We rarely go out w/o each other and I definitely have never been out drinking with the girls all night. By The Way all the women I know have kids and they don’t leave their kids just to go out…..not for drinks, dinner, or anything after 5 pm.
Now bees, I don’t mind him going out with the guys but considering the guys are over 35 they act like teenage boys. They only do this once every month or two and then they always get someone in trouble. They stay out until 3-5 am on work nights and when one of the spouses gets upset, they ALL tell their wives if they would only “allow” them to go out more often, they wouldn’t feel the need to push it…i.e. staying out all night and coming home drunk. I personally think this type of behavior is childish and I understand why the wives get upset.
The husbands have actually told me “they need to blow off steam once in a while.” To which I respond “well maybe your wives need to blow off steam too so maybe she could do the same another night.” Ummm, nope, they don’t allow their wives to go out w/o them…especially drinking…I mean she could get drunk and maybe even hit on!!!!
So is it the same thing? How should I approach it? I feel like it’s the stupidest argument ever but Darling Husband is being stubborn and it keeps getting brought up.