Post # 1
My fiance is Filipino and a money dance is a well-loved tradition at Filipino weddings. I know in some circles they are considered impolite, but it means a lot to my fiance to honor his heritage with one at our reception. Since half our guests will be caucasian and might be offended with the money dance, I want to put a card at each table explaining the tradition. I’m having trouble with the wording. Can you read this and let me know if you have any suggestions for the wording?
<span style=”font-family: Arial”><font size=”3″>The Sayaw ng Pera, or money dance, is a Filipino wedding tradition. </font><span style=”font-family: Arial”><font size=”3″>Guests are invited to dance with the bride and groom. </font><span style=”font-family: Arial”><font size=”3″>The Maid of Honor and Best Man collect gifts which the newlyweds use to start their life together. The dance continues until all the guests have had an opportunity to express their best wishes to the newlyweds. </font><span style=”font-family: Arial”><font size=”3″>A long money dance is considered good luck for a long marriage!</font>
Post # 3
Don’t know how to word it, but maybe put something in there that implies that a very small gift is fine. Like maybe say, "in some cultures it is also called the dollar dance, since that is what is normally given as a gift"
Post # 4
"The dance continues until all the guests have had an opportunity to express their best wishes to the newlyweds." That makes it sound like it’s mandatory for the guests. Maybe just "The dance continues until all the guests who wish to dance have had the opportunity."
This topic caused quite a stir in a recent Bee post. I think it’s a fun tradition, but a lot of other people objected.
Post # 5
I’m filipina and grew up seeing the money dance at many weddings. I enjoy that you’re making the effort to be mindful of those who are less familiar with this tradition by making an informational card. Extra points for using the filipino title! 🙂 I didn’t use the Sayaw ng Pera at my wedding (my husband is caucasian) because the number of people who are used to seeing this as tradition were faaaar less than the number of those in attendance whose opinions would’ve covered everything from "ooh, a cultural wedding tradition" to "that’s kinda tacky…". Had we gotten married closer to where my parents live (they have a large filipino community nearby and therefore the numbers would’ve been different) you can bet your bottom we would’ve included it!
I agree with rosychicklet; change the wording in your card from "all the guests" to "all the guests who wish to dance" and you’ve covered your bases. have fun!
Post # 6
I am filipina too and all the weddings I attended include the "money dance" and it’s just a fun way of contributing to the couple’s future together. What makes it fun is pinning the dollars on the couple so that’s how we’ve usually done it instead of having your Maid/Matron of Honor & Best man collect the money, it’s more light-hearted and fun to pin onto the clothing. You have your guest line up, all the men on one side to dance with the bride and all the women lined up to dance with the groom. So I would change the collection part and when guests see how this tradition is fun then guests would probably wouldn’t be offended by it. What you do is also, explain ahead of time to your family and friends about how its a tradition on many cultures to do the "money or dollar dance".
At some weddings, they have the pins in a cute little pin cushion or pillow on each table, then you can have a little note attached to it. you should also have your MC annouced it and give a little background on what it is. and say,
"The Sayaw ng Pera is a Filipino wedding tradition that gives the guests the opportunity to offer their wishes and contribute to starting off the newlyweds in future together. Guests who wish to dance with the bride or groom are welcome to use the pins. A long dance is considered good luck for a long marriage. Thank you!"
Hope this helps! =) good luck! My Fiance isn’t filipino but I explained to him what it is and I’m not putting any note but I’ll have our MC just annouce it when it happens to let guests know what’s going on. Usually when you have the guests that know about the tradition they will take the lead on starting it off and others will follow if they choose to.
Post # 7
What about just extending the invitations to your guest. I’m not a writer…but explain the dance and tradtion, then say "You are invited to join in with this tradition" Also maybe say "small gifts, momentos, and tokens of love" That way maybe all guest will dance if they think they can just maybe give you advice or something to help you in the future. Then also, those familiar with the dance will know to give money and everyone will be happy.