- 4 years ago
- Wedding: August 2012
Miss-Mauverick: Thanks. Yep, I’ve been able to maintain some friendships with friends who have had kiddos, and lost others. It’s most certainly a complex situation… Good for you for sharing with your sis, I imagine that would have been a tough convo to have… <3
I would advise her to channel her energy to one of the many online forums for people who are TTC, who have had MC, etc. It can be quite therapeutic to share experiences with those who are experiencing similar things.
I think it is very important to support friends and be understanding of their various struggles. At the same time, I think it’s disrespectful when a friend treats another friend as a therapist. Friendship and therapy hold different roles, and I think it’s key to keep friendship as a two-way street.
Maybe you can kindly suggest she find a professional to talk to? Perhaps emphasize that you DO care, but perhaps you’re not the best equipt to deal with all the emotional information she is throwing on you.
Yes, a good friend will listen to their friend’s worries and what’s important to them, but it’s boring and self-centred when anybody talks exclusively about their issues – whatever the issue may be – and doesn’t ever ask their friend about themselves or show any interest in having a two-way relationship. What OP is describing sounds more like therapist/patient than two friends and that is not OP’s responsibility.
If you are mentally drained by her, you can’t be a good friend to her either. If you must block her for a few hours a day, it doesn’t make you a bad friend. Time before cell phones, we all had to wait till nighttime to get messages.
Thanks for all the suggestions Bees, much appreciated! Xxx
Agree to limit texts to her to 2 a day (or whatever you feel comfortable with). Do NOT feel obligated to comment to every thing , I understand it would get exhausting. Hopefully she will get the picture, if not, again you don’t have to reply to every single text of hers. I have had a couple unfortunate circumstances with MC and another problem and I don’t want to talk about it ad nauseum with my friends or family. If other people are different, I get it, but you don’t have to be her therapist. If she needs one, she should get a professional to talk to.
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