Post # 1
So I never thought I’d be one of those people who had mom related wedding issues but alas here I am and I would love your suggestions on how to deal with it. My mom started looking for her dress for the wedding about 3 days after we announced our engagement. Yes, 3 days. At this point I think she has been to every bridal salon that carries MOB dresses within a 75 mile radius. Yesterday she told me she thinks she found a dress that she loves and it’s red. Only problem is, our colors our navy, gold and magenta accents. She knows this. I told her that I’ve very happy she found something she likes but asked if the dress came in blue. She said it does but she doesn’t want to wear blue because then she’ll blend in with the rest of the wedding party and all the décor and she “wants to stand out.” I kid you not, those were her words. I joking said “of course, you’re the star of the show.” To which she assured me that clearly I’ll be the star in the big white dress.
I tried to explain to her that it would look best in pictures if the families coordinated with the color scheme so to focus the eye on the bride and groom and create a cohesive photo. She told me she thought it would make absolutely no difference in the pictures. Here is where I need your help bees! Could you please post pictures of weddings where the mothers are wearing coordinating colors and where they are not so I can show my mom what a difference it makes visually. Otherwise I’m at a loss of what to say to her to make her understand that her wearing a red dress is not so kosher.
Post # 3
@Meowkers: I will definitely post when I get home as I am at work right now. However, you can probably find some pictures on the internet just by googling. Also, tell your mother that since you havent done very much planning the style and color scheme of your wedding could possibly change. Tell her as much as you think she is beautiful in whatever she wears that you would really appreciate her wearing a more toned down color. My mom wore a robins egg blue dress and she stood out but not TOO much and I thought she looked beautiful!
Post # 4
Thank you. I’m looking forward to your pictures. I’ve done some googling but haven’t found much. Just keeping an eye out for pictures on various wedding blogs.
Post # 5
My Mother-In-Law wore a purple dress, my SIL wore green and brown. Our colors were blue/white/silver, and yet I don’t think they looked out of place at all. I was pleased that my Mother-In-Law and SIL had both found outfits that they were happy and comfortable with tbh.
Here’s a pic of us with our parents:
And with all of both families together:
I know it’s not bright red like you are talking about, but it did stand out a bit because it wasn’t in our color scheme. I didn’t mind it one bit though. I thought she looked beautiful and same with my SIL! 🙂
Post # 6
I really don’t think it would be that bad! Our wedding was red and white with gold accents (BMs in red dresses). My mom wore a yellow dress and my Mother-In-Law wore a purple dress and they both looked absolutely beautiful and it didn’t look strange in pictures at all! (I don’t have pictures with me that I can post as I’m at work).
Post # 7
To be completely honest I don’t think it makes a difference.
My parents were never in pictures with the wedding party or with my DHs husband for that matter. We never did a big family shot I don’t know why it just didn’t happen.
My mom wore a purple dress:
My Mother-In-Law wore a cobalt blue dress:
And my Bridesmaid or Best Man were in hot pink like the groom’s tie.
My personal opinion is if they are comfortable and happy that is all that matters!
But if it really matters to you I am sure she will understand.
Post # 8
It is not a big deal..and does not even sound like a clashing color… seems petty
Post # 9
Your mother is a grown woman, and she doesn’t need to match the wedding party 🙂 It’ll be ok 🙂
Post # 10
I think the red is really going to clash with the magenta. Tell her it’s not about matching or standing out, but about the clashing. Show her some red next to some magenta to help make your point.
Post # 11
It really doesn’t matter. I also kind of freaked out before our wedding about the color of the moms’ dresses. But I promise you, it does not matter ONE bit. First of all, we don’t have any pictures with my mom and the bridal party (except my sister, because she was my MOH), so you don’t havev worry about their dresses “clashing”. Not to mention, there is no way that anyone will be able to tell your color scheme from pictures of you and your parents, so don’t worry about her not matching it! As for the reception pics, the focus will be on the people and not on the decorations, so again–Don’t worry!! Let her wear what she wants; better to save your energy for another battle 🙂
Post # 12
My mom and both of my MIL’s wore the same colors as our wedding party. Here is what it looked like, excuse the picture, our photographer wasn’t that great!
Post # 13
I found this picture which kind of illustrates your point about the eye being drawn to the bright red, but honestly – does this ruin the picture? not for me. I don’t think this is a big problem.
If you are really caught up on this go ahead and try to persuade her to get a different dress (maybe suggest that she doesn’t have to get a “MOB” dress, a dress from any store will work) or suggest some bold colors that you’d be ok with, but I don’t think this is a battle I’d feel like fighting…
you can always print your pictures in black and white 😉
Post # 14
I think it will be fine, since your colour scheme is strong, she won’t stand out too much. If you had pastels and she was wearing red, then maybe say something, as she might look out of place. My BMs were in pale blue, and my mum wore pale pink, which toned without directly matching. I was just irritated that my Mother-In-Law wore pink, too – she never ever wears pink, and I told her my mum was wearing it, and she went ahead anyway. It looks like I dictated what they were wearing – very iritating (although ultimately minor).
Post # 15
My Mom wore a shade of purple and my bridesmaids wore black. Our “pop” of color was fuschia. I think she looked great and didn’t “stand out”, even though we never had a photo taken with her in it along with the wedding party.
Post # 16
My MIL’s dress didn’t go with our wedding colors at all and it didn’t bother me (or anyone else a bit).