- 3 years ago
- Wedding: December 1969
Okay, I know there are lots of posts about this but I’m going to go ahead and ask anyway; how do you all feel it is best to address the issue of moving in with you SO with your parents?
Here’s the situation; I’m 19, almost 20 y.o., from Oklahoma living in NYC and going to university here. I have a 3.89 GPA, so I’m a good student and not a troublemaker in other aspects of my life. I have been dating the same boy, well man now technically (he’s 22) haha, since we were freshmen in high school. At this point in time, I am a full time student working part-time Nanning/babysitting jobs when I can, but I am majoring in adolescent education, which requires a lot of time and dedication to my studies. This means that I still rely on the financial backing of my extremely supportive parents.
I am currently living in on-campus housing provided by my university. That being said, I want to move “off campus” with my boyfriend and a few of our friends. We’re looking at 2 or 3 br apartments that would allow for us to have either 3 or 4 people splitting rent. We’re not looking for an unreasonably luxurious pad but something nice, with a doorman or virtual doorman system. Something like this would place our rent at about 1155-1800/person/month, which is quite reasonable in the city. That being said, on-campus housing runs 8000/semester so anything off-campus would essentially be less expensive. Everyone would provide his or her own share of rent/groceries/general apartment fare, so the cost would be split easily.
My parents are hesitant to let me move in with my boyfriend, yet have no issue with me moving in with a group of friends. Any time the subject comes up, both of my parents are more than happy to talk about looking for places with platonic friends but as soon as the boyf gets mentioned (which I am sure to bring him into the conversation relatively early on,) they become defensive and question my reasoning.
What are some tips on talking to them about living with my boyfriend and a few of our mutual friends? Should I just voluntarily lose this battle because I still rely in their monetary support? Or am I missing some piece of “logic” when trying to explain this all to my parents?
Anything would help!