Post # 16
I don’t disagree with the Bees here, but I think that what is going may be a much deeper issue given the porn and erectile issues.It is hard to know if his actions were about seeking a sexual relationship or about building up his ego. It is a form of cheating, but it sounds to me like he may have deeper issues that are driving this behavior. If he was wiling to seek counseling, and takes this seriously, I might give him some time.
Otherwise, then you have to decide if you want to spend your life worrying about what he is doing. You say how you are in frequent/semi-constant contact when he travels. Why? Are you being loving or are you really keeping tabs on him because you don’t trust him? As someone whose been married for a long time, it really speaks to a level of distrust and fear in your relationship. Talking once or twice/day is pretty normal and more than sufficient for a solid relationship. There are cracks in the foundation of this relationship that you need to face-up to and make a plan to address.
Post # 18
I actually find it more worrisome that he adjusted his privacy settings because he knew you were online at the time. That’s devious.
This must be devastating for you. I suggest couple counselling. This is non negotiable. I’d want to see why he felt a last hurrah was necessary.
Stop with the wedding plans until you trust him again.
Post # 19
I divorced my ex due to his porn & sex addiction. I’d run far, far away from this. Can I ask how old you both are?
Post # 20
Which part of this relationship is “perfect?”
Post # 21
Exactly what I was going to say. I can not stand when people think sex has to be involved for it to be cheating.
Post # 22
He already did cheat. And he’ll do it again. And with the porn and sex addiction, I’d never trust him. Personally, I’d leave this relationship.
Post # 23
You really think he didn’t have sex with her? That they just walked around all day/night while his privacy setting were up? Really? Sure.
Post # 24
You should kick this guy out before noon today. Why would you put up with this?
Post # 25
What do you do after learning your Fiance just dated another woman? At the very least you postpone your wedding.
Your relationship isn’t/wasn’t perfect and leading with that is troubling. There are no perfect people and there are no perfect relationships.
Post # 3
The advice will be the same here as in the other thread.
Post # 4
Please reread your opening line..”Me and fiance have the perfect relationship”.. and he’s cheating on you??? You need to reevaluate where your priorities are and why you accept this.
Post # 5
His “opportunity for a ‘last hoorah'” was before you two started dating. It’s crazy to me that people put up with this shit.
Post # 6
Girl, are you ever going to let this go? Because I personally wouldn’t. It would stick in the back of my mind and come out in passive aggressive ways forever. Don’t sign up for that. It’s not your fault if you cancel the wedding. He put you in this position.