Post # 1
Ok Bee’s my good friend (I’ll call her Amy) is getting married this July and somehow or another I’m in charge of planning the bachelorette party! I don’t mind doing it at all I just have never been to one and don’t know what to plan for, who pays for what, etc.
‘Amy’ wants a surprise fun night out in a big city about 1 hour away with hotel room, fun checklists, p*nis things, etc. We don’t need a limo since the hotel room I’m currently looking into is about a block away from a strip of bars and restaurants. She gave me a list of 14 girls she wants invited, which includes herself and the 5 bridesmaids and here’s where I have questions…
Do I send out invitations to everyone on her list?
Instead of invitations can I send out a mass email with all the details, once they’re finalized?
I don’t know about 6 of the girls so should I try contacting them on facebook first to get phone number, address, email address, etc to kind of break the ice so to speak?
Do the girls not in the wedding party pay for any extras such as if we were to get stripper, custom shirts, any decorations, bride’s dinner, and split hotel costs if they’re staying?
What time do bach. parties ususally start? Dinner and then out bar hopping is our plan.
I’ve tried and tried asking the other bridesmaids what they want to do but get no help. The Maid/Matron of Honor flat out told ‘Amy’ that she planned the entire bridal shower by herself and her other bridesmaids can plan the bachelorette party. Mind you the Maid/Matron of Honor did not once ask for help, advice, or anything for the shower – and even when I sent the bachelorette party email to the Bridal Party I asked if she needed anything and she said it was all taken care of.
Post # 3
You don’t have to send physical invites – I’ve seen both (emails/e-vites and physical invites) so whatever is easier for you.
Since the bride gave you a list of ppl to invite, I would ask her for their addresses – or I know my Maid/Matron of Honor wanted to send an e-vite so she sent all of them messages on FB (she didn’t know everyone either)
Since it sounds like the bride wants all the fun/common bachelorette party stuff – be sure to get her a veil, sash, other things for her to wear that night. You can find all kinds of bachelorette games and stuff at sex shops.
We got dressed in our hotel room – so I would ask the bride if she would like to do this, if not I would say dinner at 6 and then party till the wee hours!
Post # 4
I just got back from Vegas for my cousins wedding. It was a long weekend of events:
Thursday was the bachelor & bachelorettes parties……
Her Maid/Matron of Honor planned our night out. What she did was send out EVITES to everyone. She made them really cute and explained the itinerary of what we would be doing and the cost and then each person could RSVP through the EVITE.
We were responsible for our cover charge into a club (that included some drinks, she pre-arranged the rate on their bachelorette specials). So that was $25 (included cover charge and 2 drink coupons each)
We were also supposed to pay for our dinner…..(but when the check came my cousin whipped out her credit card as a surprise..she was happy to have all us girls with her and she paid)
The Maid/Matron of Honor had already booked a room for us to stay the night and also to meet to have pre-party cocktails (The Venetian – expensive) and she paid for it. Didn’t ask us to chip in for that. (although we would have..it was so nice and convenient too)
The Maid/Matron of Honor bought all the decorations, drinks & snacks for the room. She was going to pay for a stripper…but if we went to a strip club we would have paid our way in.
Post # 5
Here are my answers. The etiquette gods might not agree, but this is what I have seen and done in the past.
- Yes, I think its fine to send a mass email. You probably want to coordinate with the bridesmaids before though to find a date that works for them.
- Yup, I think its a great idea to facebook the girls you dont know and get their email addresses. Every bachelorette i have been to has been super informal
- Generally everyone but the brides split the cost of everything. If someone isnt staying in the hotel then of course they wouldnt chip in for that
- It depends what you guys have planned for the day but if youre doing dinner and then out, I would probably meet around 5ish? This gives everyone time to meet at the hotel, have a few drinks, play silly games, and then head out to dinner