(Closed) Help! NO registry but need help with wording!

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
13014 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

You shouldn’t put anything.  If you have no registry, people will get the hint that you want money.  It’s rude to request cash straightout.  Have your parents spread the word that you’re saving up for something big (a house, new car, big vacation) and would like contributions towards that, but I wouldn’t put anything on a wedding website. 

Whatever you do, please don’t use one of those grating poems that “cutely” ask for money.  They aren’t cute, at all.

Post # 5
Member
8738 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

@bump:  If you don’t want a website, you don’t have to have one.

It can be useful though if anyone is traveling in from out of town. You can have a page about places to stay/things to do in the area. 

You can also put all the info about the ceremony, reception, and any additional events (if you are having them) there.

But if all your guests are local and there are no additional events (i.e. rehearsal dinner or morning after brunch) then you may not need a website at all.

Post # 7
Member
8738 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

@bump:  Well then there you go! You don’t need to spend time on a website and just instruct those close to you (i.e. you mom, BMs, etc) to let people know, if they ask, that you would prefer cash as you are saving up for x.

Also, be aware that some people will want to buy you things and will do so even if you don’t have a registry. So don’t be surprised if you do get some items for your home.

Post # 8
Member
13014 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@bump:  It’s fine to not have a website if you don’t want one.  I have one for all the reasons that KatNYC2011 listed above. 

Post # 9
Member
6015 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

We were married last weekend and didn’t do a website or registry.  We got one set of wine glasses and the rest were checks and cash.  We are combining two households so we didn’t need more “stuff”.

Post # 10
Member
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@abbie017:  Exactly what she said!

People always know cash is an acceptable gift, and will surely take the hint if you have no registry.  The random person who gets you a ceramic rooster will likely have still bought that rooster if you had registered!  🙂

Post # 11
Member
3175 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

You don’t need a website, and you really shouldn’t put anything on a registry tab of a website if you don’t have a registry.

Personally, we *do* have a registry, but it’s not mentioned on our website, because I feel uncomfortable having it there. There’s no rule that you *have* to have a website or that you *have* to have a registry tab.

Post # 13
Member
51 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I think everyone you invite to the wedding obviously knows you and if you are  already living together or at least are living on your own and have household items then if you are not registered then  that’s a pretty big hint you want money not things. We are having a wedding website but that’s because we are having a destination wedding so we need to include a lot of information prior to the wedding. If you do have a lot of out of town guests its a nice way to provide them proper information and being able to click a link is a lot easier than trying to get word of mouth information!

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