(Closed) Help– nontraditional bridal party

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
3078 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@rolerkite:  One of my friends didn’t want a bridal party but wanted her friends to feel involved, so she had them get dresses and got them corsages.  They didn’t stand up there or anything but they helped out with planning and set up and everything and still felt very involved.

Post # 4
Member
46670 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I wouldn’t ask them to get any particular dress if they are not “bridesmaids”.

Do you have a friend or family member who would recognize all these women and be able to help you? You could ask that friend to distribute a small bouquet or individual flower to each of these friends a s they enter for the ceremony.

You could attach a personalized tag saying what each of them means to you.

Post # 5
Member
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@julies1949:  I like the flower idea.  You could also invite them to get ready with you on the day of – obviously they don’t need to, but that’s one of my favorite things about being a bridesmaid.

Post # 7
Member
46670 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@rolerkite:  The lantern idea is great! Just tell them that ” if you were having attendants, you would have asked them, but seeing as you aren’t you would love for them to be part of the wedding” and ask them to do that for you. Frankly, you may find some of them will be relieved. They can wear a dress of their choice, and be part of the wedding but have no other formal duties.

Post # 8
Member
1660 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I like the lantern idea! I also like the idea of giving them flowers to wear… I gave my readers flower corsages to pin to their dresses and they looked great. If you wanted, you could ask them to all wear black dresses or something – but I don’t think it’s necessary.

Post # 9
Member
57 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I am doing the same thing!! I have so many sisters (6) and so many good friends I have made through the years that it would just be too hard to have a wedding party. I have been a bridesmaid ten times and feel that I would hurt all 10 of those girls if they weren’t apart of my wedding party…. Eventually, we ended up deciding on having just a family ONLY wedding because our list was getting into the 400s. A lot of people have been offended and liek you said it was what I intended NOT to do, but we are having a huge party on our 1 year anniversary for all of our friends and family. My FH has been married before and has a 7 year old son and I have never been set on a huge wedding with all of the attention on me- so this idea worked perfect for us. His son is going to be the best man and that is my entire wedding party! To honor my sisters (what you could do for your friends) – I am having them stay in a suite with me the night before and paying for their hair and make up to be done for the wedding. This way it will still be fun and have that “wedding party feel” the day of for all of us 🙂

Good Luck and don’t let anyone make you feel bad into changing what YOU want for YOUR wedding! XO

Post # 10
Member
3625 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Maybe I’m just being uncooperative, but I wouldn’t cave and try to mold these ladies into pseudo-BMs just because they are shocked/hurt/whatever. You are the bride and it is a small, intimate wedding. I’m not having a bridal party and initially FI’s sister was shocked but she realized it is our day and we didn’t want one. My thought is that if they are real friends, they would be excited that you are getting married and less concerned about the pomp and circumstance of it all. I have a lot of friends that have offered their help and stood by my side through all of this and there hasn’t been any talks of being designated as Bridesmaid or Best Man because of their help.

With this in mind, maybe you can incorporate them in other decidedly not traditional Bridesmaid or Best Man ways, such as a reader during the ceremony. In addition, if one is a good singer, maybe she would be willing to be a soloist either during the ceremony or the reception. They can also be asked to give a toast at the RH or something.

 

The topic ‘Help– nontraditional bridal party’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors