Post # 1
hi bees, two questions! my fiance and i will be having a destination wedding, it will be a symbolic outdoor ceremony, i believe there are certain things you cant use like “request the honor of your precense” because it is not a religious ceremony so i need help with wording.
Also, we are paying for the majority of the wedding (i’d say about 75%) but my parents have contributed, we’ve never asked for them to help, we were ok paying for everything ourselves from the start, but being the only daughter they want to contribute, which is no problem to us. so i was told by another bee the wording on the invitation should start with “Mr & Mrs brides parents request…” but i have a feeling grooms family (because they are very opinionated) will bring up their names not being on the invitation. I’d like to state they have never once offered to pay for anything and we’ve NEVER asked, we’ve made it clear from the start groom and i are paying for the wedding. I would think they would want to contribute something since groom is the only son and his sisters are all adults but no one in his family has said anything. What should we say when they ask why their names are not on the invitation? Groom and I are closer to my family than his so i dont want them to think it was my idea or i am the one who wanted my parents name on the invitation. what if they said we never asked? we never asked my parents but they sat down with us and told us to please accept their help. thoughts??
Post # 2
It would be the groom’s parents names if they were paying. Since yours have offered money, then their names should be on the invitation.
But, since you are paying for the majority yourselves, it would be fine to say that you both request people to be at your wedding. You don’t have to put any parents names on it 🙂 It is up to you.
Post # 3
Having just ordered my invites and gotten excellent advice from the awesome stationary woman, here are some things that might help:
1) You are right about honor — that is only used when it’s happening in a church. Our is happening outside so we used “joyfully request the pleasure of your company”
2) Lots of different ways to give names:
“Together with our families, AMY BEE and JOE JONES request….”
“Mr and Mrs. Amy Bee request…..marriage of their daughter AMY MARIE” with no mention of Fiance parents
“Mr. and Mrs. Amy Bee request…..marriage of their daughter AMY MARIE to JOE MICHAEL, son of Mr. and Mrs. Joe Smith”
If you go with the third option, you’re not really sugguesting that his parents are paying for the wedding, just acknowleding them.
Post # 4
mmbride80: Invitations are not a family tree and they are not a billboard advertisement for who is funding the shindig. The only people who are listed on the invitations are hosts and paying =/= hosting. It sounds like you are hosting your wedding, so I would list your names. Possibly including “Together with their families” if you want to incorporate your parents somehow.
Post # 5
what’s a symbolic ceremony?
Also, maybe talk to your parents about what they would like?