Post # 1
My guy and I are eloping to San Francisco in early September. I need to wear something. I’ve been messaging with a few dressmakers on etsy, but I feel nervous about investing in a dress I will only wear once and that I might feel really anxious in.
I have had a lot of medical issues in last few years, and due to steroids, medications, and surgery I’ve gained weight. I am working to get healthier, but I will still be about 50 pounds heavier than I’d like to be when we officially put a ring on it.
I live in Ohio, so it’s no short journey to the West coast and I’m hoping to pack in such a way as to avoid checking luggage. We’re exploring the Monterey/Carmel/Big Sur area after our civil ceremony and will be away for a week all told.
I need your help. Should I invest in a dress? Right now that cost would be about $420 with shipping. I don’t think I can do much better being plus size and particular. If I was a tiny woman I’d just pick something vintage and go with it.
Has anyone else taken the risk of ordering a dress online? Did you regret it?
Is a civil ceremony worth buying a dress for?
I’d like to look nice, and we did hire a lovely photographer for an hour to appease those who will inevitabley be disappointed in our lack of a public display back home.
I feel silly stressing this so much, I’ve been battling with myself since April. Help!
Post # 3
A civil ceremony is definitely worth buying a dress for! It just depends how much you want to spend. If $420 is feasible for you, then go for it! Does the seller have a return policy, in case you’re not satisfied with the purchase?
Post # 4
@renaikekkon: YES, I think you should buy a dress!! It is an extraordinary day regardless of the venue. Try something in tea length and less formal. Even if you get hitched at the courthouse, you’ll still want a few keepsake photos. The dress doesn’t have to be fancy and expensive; and it will help make your day even more memorable. Just my 2 cents. 🙂
Post # 5
I totally think its worth wearing a dress for! I also live in Ohio and my fiancé and I are eloping in late September in New York City, my cousin owns a bridal shop and I ended up getting a dress through her! My dress was discontuined so super cheap! Plus she had a bunch others for like 99.00! I am also plus size so I know how hard it is to find something you love and it to fit! Good luck!
Post # 6
Do you have your heart set on an Etsy dress? Have you considered good old David’s Bridal? Check some of these out… lots of cute options including short and tea length dreses, and plus sized as well (thought, you don’t mention if you’re plus-sized or not, just that you’re heavier than your ideal weight).
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Thanks so much everyone! This is definitely helping me get my bearings. It’s nice to know that it’s ok to make my own decision- and it doesn’t have to be a traditional dress.
The one I was thinking about having custom made would be a wrap front corset sweetheart style with a lace up back going in to lace and then quarter length lace sleeves and a tea length tulle skirt. It’d be $420 with shipping. They do have a return policy, but it is very strict.
I’m going to look into some more sites that offer non-traditional dresses (I guess I hadn’t considered that much before) and decide what is more important to me.
I don’t really want to go to David’s Bridal for a few reasons, although I did look at their offerings online.
I’ll let everyone know what I decide, and in the meantime, keep the suggestions coming! I really liked seeing couples not dressed to the nines- all of the pictures I’ve seen of San Francisco ceremonies have been SO fancy.
Post # 10
Could you just buy a dress from a normal store? That’s what I did for my teeny tiny 4-guest wedding. To me it’s not worth paying hundreds of dollars… and I would be afraid to buy something custom online in case it doesn’t pan out.
Post # 11
I vote yes – get something special, and by special I don’t mean that it has to be crazy expensive.
Here is what I wore for my City Hall wedding. The dress was originally $700 but thanks to an end of year sale I got it for $250. Even though we are having a reception where I will wear a nice dress (also not traditional) I am still happy that I had a little white dress for City Hall.
Post # 12
That is a cute dress! Love the colored shoes!
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Ok, I have completely laid to waste my former ideals and have decided to just get a dress that I will feel comfortable in. I’ve narrowed it down to two options.
Both are under $200, which I feel much better about.
@sienna76 All of those dresses are lovely, but all of those brides do not have my 38DDD boobs. Unfortunately, even at my smallest, I was never a bare-my-arms type of girl. I like wearing hoodies. 🙂
For those of you that are reading, do either of these look ok? With the mexican dress I would sew a beaded/embroidered belt/sash type of thing, with the first I might add some sparkly detail. Thoughts?
Post # 16
I like the first one. It feels a little more dressy and would look great with sparkly detail. For the second, even though you can give it a better belt, the cotton fabric looks casual to me.