Help! Should I cancel my wedding??

posted 10 months ago in Emotional
Post # 31
Member
550 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2020 - Summer Camp!

You know, you have your dreams about traveling, and maybe suburban motherhood isn’t the meaningful path for you…and that’s totally okay! Do what makes you happy, regardless of what society thinks. We live in a time where women are independent and have options. Even if he was perfect except for in that way, I’d still tell you to pause and consider if that’s truly what you want. It’s going to be hard, but you’ll do both of you a favor if you end it and move on. 

Post # 32
Member
2300 posts
Buzzing bee

Excuse me if you addressed this or if someone else already asked…but did this man *force* you to have an abortion?? i saw where you said you didn’t really want to, but felt like you HAD to…

paired with anger problems and lack of empathy for your mental health, the forced abortion would just be the icing on the cake of the list of reasons to run for the hills. your intuition has been telling you to run from the very FIRST date. listen to it before your fate is sealed and you’re legally anchored to this guy.

Post # 33
Member
531 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2019

Relationships should never be like this. At all. I was in a relationship with a horrible guy when I was the same age as you. I also battle depression and anxiety and being with him was anxiety 24/7 after awhile among other bad things. Luckily I got out of it and healed and when I was 34 I met an amazing man who showed me what a real loving, healthy, game free, drama free relationship can be like. I’m 39 now and we’re getting married this month. You’ve got plenty of time! Please don’t settle for feeling the way you do. 

Post # 34
Member
1 posts
Wannabee

Goodness you are dealing with a LOT. I’m so sorry for your situation. It’s heartbreaking and can take years to get over. I think that you know what you need to do and many of the other posts have given you great advice and suggestions so I won’t repeat it except to say that you deserve to be happy and should work to protect that happiness at all costs. Life is hard enough without signing up for a stressful eternity with someone that doesn’t sound incredibly supportive. 

I think we can all relate to that fear of starting over but you never know what life has in store for you. Don’t hold on to this for the sake of having something. I know that we represent a wide range of ages and experiences, I’m 42 and am getting married for the first time in September. As scary as it is to think about starting over, going into a situation like this seems even scarier on many counts. 

I hope that you can make the best decision for yourself and your wellbeing. Process this stuff in therapy. We’re here if you need us. xo

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