(Closed) Help! Which is dress is better?

posted 9 months ago in Dress
  • poll: Which dress options works best?
    Dress A, the beaded dress : (25 votes)
    17 %
    Dress B, the floral dress : (6 votes)
    4 %
    Dress C, the galettes- just order it without trying it on. : (28 votes)
    19 %
    None of the above, please explain. : (89 votes)
    60 %
  • Post # 31
    331 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2019

    Oh bee I feel for you!! Both dresses do look rather booby and I think it’s the unsupported boob that’s not helping. I’m sorry to join the bandwagon but it is true. But they are not awful and you do look amazing it’s just that they do look perilously free roaming.

    For what it’s worth I think you look great and I think personally the strapless dress suits you far better and you could get one that flares out more. All that said if these dresses make you happy go for it! A bit of structure and support will help no end. 

    There is nothing wrong with you at all – you will look beautiful, it’s just that what looks great on one person can look shit on another and you just have to find ‘you’

    good luck!

    Post # 33
    229 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2019 - UK

    pantsapocalypse :  Go for the floral dress. If this thread has shown you anything is that you love the dress and that is what matters most. I personally think its the best option of the three because it look’s like it is the one that would be the easiest to alter if you feel the one in your size is a bit too small or to big for your breast size. I think you mentioned that the dresses tried on where too small and I think that’s what is throwing a lot of people off on here. At the moment the bust part of the dress look a little unfaltering simply because the dress is too small, once you have your size they will look lovely. 


    Personally. if you went with the floral dress I would add the white belt from dress 1. I think it looks more like its part of the dress. And then add a statement necklace, just to balance it out because there is a lot going on in the skirt. And you can definitely pull of a statement necklace. 


    Don’t get disheartened, you really do look lovely in the dresses. Just a lot of people cant look past a dress being to small. Especially on another person they don’t know.



    Post # 36
    48 posts
    • Wedding: August 2019

    pantsapocalypse :  I’m really sorry this has upset you this much. These forums can be really harsh. If I insulted or hurt you, I’m really sorry and would like to apologise! It wasn’t my intention at all. Please don’t be too disheartened – have a beautiful wedding and a beautiful dress that you love – all the best to you! X

    Post # 37
    1030 posts
    Bumble bee


    pantsapocalypse :   I’m so sorry you feel that was our interpretations, and I hope mine wasn’t among them; it wasn’t my intention. I don’t often comment on the dress threads at all, beyond to say something is attractive or silently vote. I contributed what I thought were genuine suggestions based on also being busty and going through the dress process as a busty, 5’3” bride, who started off with measurements I was embarrassed to share with you so that you knew I was coming from a good place. I did not read your comment about being an experienced bust taper who had used it in the past. I didn’t say anything in this thread that wasn’t also advice I found relevant to myself at the time of trying on dresses, and I really, really loved some of the alternates I was guided to for my own self after someone suggested a drop waist gown with highly structured bodicework. I think many of us misunderstood that you weren’t looking for help finding ANY dress style (because of your 4th vote option), but wanted a vote of confidence between several that you already very much liked, and I think that swayed the way a lot of Bees responded.

    Post # 38
    1299 posts
    Bumble bee

    Op it’s not personal, the dresses aren’t made to accommodate your beautiful, larger body type. 

    Something with straps and structure would make a world of difference. Shopping can be depressing. I would fit for the top, you can have the style of the skirt altered if you don’t like aline. But I would make sure you get a good supported fit. Doesn’t mean you can’t show the girls but show them in the more flattering way… imho. Good luck 

    Post # 39
    732 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: London, UK

    OMG I am so surprised at these comments. I don’t think there is ANYTHING wrong with showing your cleavage if you feel comfortable and confident doing so!!!! I personally HATE this whole thing in society that what we wear should be ‘flattering’. ‘Flattering’ is a euphemism for ‘makes you look smaller/slimmer’. I wish we could just see a thing we like and WEAR IT, regardless of if it minimises a body part or not. I personally think dress 1 looks lovely on on, and I ADORE dress 3. 

    Yes, strangers online may see you in your wedding dress and find your boobs ‘distracting’. But I highly doubt that is what your guests are going to say or think on the day. Especially if they know you do fetish modelling as a hobby and clearly are comfortable in your skin!!! This whole thing about boobs and flattering and distracting blah blah blah is just made up by society and it’s STUPID. Boobs are just mounds of fat attached to your chest. 

    Post # 40
    1612 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2017

    pantsapocalypse :  OP you asked for an opinion, no one was overly mean that I saw upon skimming the thread, just because you are in love with these dresses for yourself doesn’t mean everyone has to be.

    They’re trying to help, if you don’t like the advice you’re being given delete the thread.

    Post # 41
    10704 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: City, State

    pantsapocalypse :  

    Oh, sweetie. You know you’re special to me.

    What difference does it make what any of us think about anyone’s dress preferences? If there was ever a time for you to do you, this is it. Get what you love and what makes you feel most beautiful. Focus on how blown away your loving fiancé is going to be the first time he sees you coming down the aisle.

    You do want to make sure you have a good alterations person. It’s quite rare for anyone not to need some nipping, hemming,  and tucking. And I totally agree with the others about having the right undergarments—crucial for all of us when wearing a wedding dress.

    It does seem that the floral has captivated you. It’s lovely and has the boho flavor you want. If you love it, it’s the right dress. 

    Post # 42
    717 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2018 - UK

    pantsapocalypse :  I totally understand the problems of trying on sample dresses when you’re busty. I just checked a size conversion chart, and in US sizes I’m a 34K, I spend my life trying to find things that fit my chest…

    When I found my dream dress, the sample size was so tight on my chest that I couldn’t breath, my cleavage was up around my neck! I had to order the dress two sizes bigger than my actual dress size so that they’d have enough room to make the alterations to the chest. After my fitting, it was perfect, my boobs were in the right place, I was comfortable, and it looked totally different.

    If you’re in love with the floral dress, go for it. For what it’s worth, I also really like the beaded dress.

    Please don’t feel bad, I don’t think people meant to hurt your feelings. For every lady struggling with big boob dramas, there’s another one wishing she had some more up top 🙂

    Post # 43
    265 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: Scotts ~ Walnut Creek

    OP I apologize if my comment was one of the triggers for you, it wasn’t my intent to hurt your feelings in any way. I was commenting based on the photos plus my own figure and dress shopping experience. Traditional dresses did not work for me, plain and simple. I’m super short with a short torso and wide hips with an a** to match. Wedding dresses are not made with the average frame in mind. Some styles made my shoulders look wider than normal, some looked weird in the waist area, some made me feel like I was drowning in fabric/layers and majority I had to try on 6 sizes up from my street size just to get the stupid satanic structures over my junk in the trunk. 🤦‍♀️ This is not some dreamy, magical experience for everyone. I ended up with a simple $94 dress from Lulus. Bridal without all the layers and structure. It took 6 months for me to get to that point.

    You asked for advice and even included a poll option for none of the above with comments so thats what you got. At the end of the day if you feel beautiful in what you’ve chosen then thats really all that matters. Feel free to ignore us internet strangers and delete this thread.

    Post # 44
    122 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2019

    I’m sorry if anything I said or suggested hurt your feelings. I thought you were looking for suggestions and opinions, and I tried to nicely give mine. I wasn’t knocking you for showing cleavage I just wanted to say that my opinion was that to me it would be distracting in that style regardless of whether it was in a bigger size or not. It’s not the dress size or any problem with your body, it’s a showy style and you have lots to show. If that’s the look you want than there’s nothing wrong with that. And my suggestions of more Aline or fit and flare styles was not one as to suggest you be “modest” because you need to fit into some social standard or norm and because bigger girls need to wear modest styles. Not at all. I didn’t look at your dress and say “oh honey she needs to cover up cuz she’s bigger”. I just felt that the lower waist (like the PP posted on those ballgowns) would be more flattering than the high waists in the dresses you posted. Do you look horrible in a higher waist? No, people won’t notice it at all. I was under the assumption you were still fully in the dress shopping mode and I was making a suggestion of another style to try that I thought would compliment your shape. I really hope that you find something you feel good in, and if you pick one of the 3 you posted as choices, you will still look great on your big day. Again, I’m sorry if I added to you feeling completely deflated. It wasn’t my intention. 

    Post # 45
    5582 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: July 2018

    Personally I think they are all just way too booby. The first one is very wide on the chest and I don’t think the spaghetti straps of the second really work for your body type.  

    I don’t think the last option would work much better either just because it is so low cut and again very wide.  

    The overall shape of the dresses is nice on you but for me the small detail of the tops and straps really kill the look for me.  

    Edit- Okay i’ve just read past the initial post.  OP I don’t think people were being mean to you.  I can understand that it is deflating to have people not love your choices but I think I and everyone else just assume that when people post dress photos that they want honest feedback. No one is saying you are ugly or the dresses are ugly but they are very revealing on you specifically, but if that is your look then own it.

    For what it is worth people also told my my dress choice was dated or looked like a prom dress.  People have different opinions. 

    I think it is unfair for you to ask for opinions and then go on a rant about how everyone “went after you” when people have tried to give you advice. 

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