(Closed) Help! Which is dress is better?

posted 7 months ago in Dress
  • poll: Which dress options works best?
    Dress A, the beaded dress : (25 votes)
    17 %
    Dress B, the floral dress : (6 votes)
    4 %
    Dress C, the galettes- just order it without trying it on. : (28 votes)
    19 %
    None of the above, please explain. : (89 votes)
    60 %
  • Post # 61
    605 posts
    Busy bee

    I don’t think any of these dresses are a good fit. I so get the struggle about finding a dress that works with a full bust! But I have no doubt the right dress for you is out there πŸ™‚

    Post # 62
    1890 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2019

    I also have a large chest, so I totally get your struggle! I think if the first one was in the correct cup size it would look fantastic on you! I think all the structure in the dress will help make you look even more amazing! If you really like the last one and it is more  your stlye, I would ask the shop what they think about the structure. Make sure there is plenty of support and boning to hold up the girls. I think that one would look beautiful on you as well! I will say from personal experience – make sure you tell them your cup size when you order. Not just your measurements. Ask for the bigger cups, it will make you feel more supported and comfortable! 

    Dress 2 is personally my least favorite, but I am only saying that because spaghetti straps are hard on women with big chests. They dig into your shoulders, or completely fall off and are just generally uncomfortable, and I think they are unflattering on women with larger upper portions. So, my opinion is clouded by that, but if you think you can make them work, go for it!

    For what its worth, I think you look beautiful in all of them! And I know how it is trying on a dress that is too small in the chest. Nothing is where it is supposed to be. Everything looks droopy and “booby” and everything until you get in the correct cup size. I don’t think you can go wrong with any of the dresses, so order the one you feel the best in and just rock it!! 

    Post # 63
    414 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: Canada

    I seriously can’t even see those dresses because of all the cleavage.  In that case, it doesn’t matter which dress you choose because that’s all your guests will be staring at as well.

    Post # 64
    6429 posts
    Bee Keeper

    pantsapocalypse :  I love the beaded option.  Is it possible they just add some fabric around the front and sides to help cover a strapless bra?

    Post # 65
    6084 posts
    Bee Keeper

    I agree with most pps that there is too much boob in these dresses, but if you really love the floral dress, I would seek out a place to try it on! Theres got to be SOME PLACE in your area that has it. Even if you have to drive a few hours on a weekend to go check it out. Id be hesitant ordering a dress you’ve not tried on, but I would absolutely make the effort to try it on if its your top pick! 

    Post # 66
    2501 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    pantsapocalypse :  

    First, you have amazing, bountiful, breasts. Second, the problem with dresses 1 and 2 is that the thin straps are literally doing all of the heavy lifting and unfortuantely, they are not quite up to the task. Also, it looks like you kind of have a short torso. I do too, and almost all “natural waist” dresses look meh on us, so I get the distaste for any A-line dresses. I ended up with a dropped waist ballgown; but something that sits a bit higher, like an empire waist dress, is also flattering. 

    I think of the dresses you posted, the third one fits your wish list best. Bite the bullet and order it in a size that fits your largest measurement and then have it altered to fit the rest. Also, ask your seamstress to shorten the straps so they suit your vertical measurements. Then bust out the tape, get everything into position, and you’ll look fabulous. Some photos for reference:

    Short torso: Also, the addition of the long sleeves is stunning!

    Straps could be shortened a bit for a better fit:

    Average torso length:

    Post # 67
    2408 posts
    Buzzing bee

    OP, your body is pretty similar to mine, and I wear a 38G bra.  I also couldn’t really fit into 90% of the dress samples out there, and I suspect my dress shopping experience was similar to yours.  So many of us on this thread have been there.

    If you’re willing to consider other dress silhouettes and styles, have you tried on anything with a queen anne neckline?  It tends to be pretty flattering on a larger bust – it allows the combination of glorious cleavage with a well-engineered bra and/or structured bodice giving support.  I was surprised to learn that a low cut queen anne neckline on a dress with cap sleeves of 3/4 sleeves was a really good look on me.  (Some queen anne style bodices are more modest looking while others are deliciously boob-a-licious, so don’t be put off by the more modest looking ones.)

    I also think a dropped waist ballgown might suit you well.

    It’s really hard when you can’t try on the beautiful sample dresses.  If you have any good department stores nearby that would carry evening dresses, it’s worth making a shopping trip to try on a bunch of non-bridal formalwear.  It’s good for the soul to be able to try on lovely dresses that are in your size, and it can also help you with silhouette and cut.  

    As a result of trying on non-bridal formalwear, I wound up choosing a wedding dress that is a full length sheath… with a low cut queen anne style bodice and cap sleeves.  I never thought I would choose a sheath, but it worked surprisingly well on my body.

    Post # 68
    7 posts
    • Wedding: July 2019 - City, State

    Aww. Don’t be disheartened. I went to 10 different salons before finding “the one”. I have the same 5’2″ and ‘too much boobs’ issue, and we happen to like the same styles! I LOVED the Galatea, but when I tried it on, my boobs felt way too big (in proportion to rest of my body) and exposed. It’s very sheer and little fabric that there’s no way you can hide the tape, unless it’s invisible? This dress is really meant for ladies with smaller boobs. Also, it’s more A-Line than Ball Gown. Here’s me in it:



    From the way you describe each dress, it doesn’t sound like any of them are “the one”. I think you should keep looking if you can. Of the first 3 dresses you posted though, I like Dress A (Beaded) the most on you. Of all the photos you posted, I actually like the sweetheart mermaid on you most. It just needs a better belt and more flare at the bottom. But if you’re a ball gown girl, ignore me lol. I ended up choosing the dress nobody preferred, but I chose it anyway because of the way it makes my eyes twinkle and how I can’t stop smiling when I’m wearing it. Like I’m falling in love all over again πŸ™‚ Also could NOT get it out of my mind no matter how many other dresses I tried after finding the one. So above all else, go with your gut!

    Also, try looking at used dresses online. Sellers usually post photos of themselves wearing them, so if you shop by size, you can see almost exactly how it would look on you. Here are some sites:




    Here are some other dresses I’d recommend trying (if you can):


    WTOO Cassia (slightly more coverage version of your Dress A)



    Stella York 6330 – this company makes AMAZING sweetheart tops for busty girls! 





    Post # 69
    595 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2019

    I actually really like the first one. I didn’t really notice boobage as it was clear they were not fitted to you. I’m not very modest and my dress is actually slightly sheer, so take my opinion with a grain of salt.

    I also LOVE the 3rd choice and it was one of my top 5 to try on, too. It sadly fit me terribly and gave me no support – I’m a large C/smaller D cup. I was so disappointed. I think BHLDN might carry it where you can order it and try on and then send back. That could be a good option to see how it fits!

    Post # 71
    545 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2018

    pantsapocalypse :  I’m sorry, but I really don’t think people were being unkind. I didn’t see any body shaming or insults or anyone intentionally hurting your feelings. Bees are generally a really kind and honest bunch. But that sometimes means people get advice or responses that they don’t want. At the end of the day, you asked for recommendations and even included a question in your poll that asked why folks didn’t think any of the above dresses were a good idea. Most bees gave very constructive feedback, provided sympathy, shared their dress shopping frustrations, gave examples and provided ample suggestions and resources to find options they thought might be better. You are the one who got upset and started getting angry. I’ve seen dozens of these threads and this one is no different than any other one. Maybe you don’t personally like the dresses on the other threads, so you think those seem kind and these seem harsh. Regardless, your emotional response likely has nothing to do with the feedback. My guess is you just really don’t like wedding dress shopping and just want to be done and hoped other people would like the dresses you were settling on. The bees didn’t like your settling dresses and told you kindly and provided more options. I know it sucks to keep shopping, but it is what it is. You’re mad that we didn’t validate your choice. But at the end of the day, it is your choice. So get the dress you like or don’t. But don’t get mad when an anonymous board has suggestions and opinions you don’t really want to hear even though you asked for it.

    I hope you have a marvelous wedding and a fantastic marriage! πŸ™‚

    Post # 72
    3093 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: January 2021

    Assuming it will fit a lot better in your actual size, the first one is by far the better of the two you tried on. It’s a very pretty dress too. I’m not such a fan of the second one. I would be very hesitant, as a fellow big ol boobied woman, to order a dress unseen so even though the third one is nice, I probably would stick with one you have actually tried on. Especially in a style like that which will very likely end up looking super releaving on you.

    I personally will be avoiding deep plunges. I do prefer v-neck lines though and am adament about choosing a dress I can wear a normal t-shirt bra with. 

    ETA: I can see why people were all “BOOBS!” when they say the photos, but I do think people are being unnecessarily dickish about it. I didn’t read this whole thread but I did skin the fist couple pages and couldn’t believe people were so quick to be so mean. Yes, there is a lot of boob going on. But you fucking ecplained that these sample dresses were multiple sizses too small!!

    Guys – there are ways of saying things that are much kinder and more sensitive to how you might make someone feel. 

    OP – Pick a dress that YOU feel good in. And for what it’s worth, I totally understand your frustration with this whole thing. I haven’t yet started dress shopping but I am already dreading it because I know it’s going to be so stressful for me. I am also a very large chested woman and super self-conscious about my boobs. I have not once in my life gone swimsuit shopping without ending up in tears. So I fuckin GET IT. The people telling you to start all over again clearly don’t. 

    Post # 73
    481 posts
    Helper bee

    pantsapocalypse :  I couldn’t roll my eyes any harder if I tried. The way you play victim when people give constructive advice about dresses and turn it into a huge drama is so unhealthy…you know advice you ASKED for specifically!

    Not a single person called you fat…and MOST shared that they’ve had the same big chest struggles! Good lord.

    The gaslighting in every one of your responses makes my blood BOIL. Like “you guuuuuuuyyyyyyyssssssssssss, you said that maybe there are better dresses for me AND didn’t kiss my ass???? You’re SO MEAN TO ME >:C!” 

    Tbh, looking at your past post history where you think other moms at your childrens’ school don’t like you, your office mates might not like you, everyone on the endometriosis forum you are on doesn’t like you, and regular people won’t like you because you are in an open relationship and have an alternative lifestyle, I think you are just LOOKING for people to dislike you to make yourself the victim, put yourself higher on your pedestal, and keep from making legitimate, healthy connections with other people.

    But yeah, good luck with your alternative relationship, lack of friends, fetish modeling, revealing dress, and feeling like everyone has so much time on their hands that they are specifically rude to *just you*.

    Post # 74
    6084 posts
    Bee Keeper

    pantsapocalypse :  So if it honestly wasn’t your intention to hurt feelings or to criticize, maybe take that into consideration in the future.

    Um why? You can’t tell people how to post. You asked for honest, unbiased opinions. Of course no one IRL is going to tell you anything negative, ESPECIALLY once you’re already upset. 

    Post # 75
    1467 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2017

    pantsapocalypse :  oh I get it, you came here to be coddled πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ sorry strangers on the internet aren’t for that.

    edit: I also want to add people have been so helpful on this board and you’re the one shitting on them not the other way around. If you can’t handle the fire get out of the kitchen. 

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