Post # 1
Ok, I need some help. My mom is deceased and as you might imagine I will be missing her more than ever on my wedding day. With that being said, I would like the seating to go as follows:
Row 1: My Grandmother & her 3 sisters (my great aunts)
Row 2: My dad, stepmom, & stepsisters & brother
Row 3: My aunts & uncles
When I told my dad the plan he seemed a little offended, Is this a bad plan. I cannot take seeing my stepmother on the first row because it was just be a reminder that my real mom is not here and besides they are just recently married so it is not like she raised me although she has been very helpful with the wedding.
Am I wrong???
Should I just let her sit on the first row with my dad and grandma?
Post # 3
i think your dad should be in the front row.
Post # 4
Your dad should absolutely be in the front row. Now.. if you don’t want your step mom right in front you could do what I did. As a bridesmaid, I hate having to awkwardly stand up front during the vows. SO.. I had the first row reserved and our bridesmaids and groomsmen sat down in the front for the ceremony. You could do this and then have you dad and step mom right behind them. That way your dad is in the first row of guests.. but your step mom isn’t right in your face. Then put grandma in the third row.
Post # 5
Eh I’m with your dad on this one. Even though you’re not a big fan of your step-mom, it IS your dad. Maybe compromise and have your step-sibs sit behind them?
Post # 6
Your dad needs to be in the front row. I think Moose1209 had a great idea of reserving the front rows for the attendents and then your dad could sit front row for guests, but you would have your stepmom right up in the front. If you kept your attendents standing then you could place a rose in your mom’s chair that way your dad could be up front and you wouldn’t feel like your stepmom is taking your mom’s seat.
Post # 7
So, when it’s time for rings.
What do the SEATED attendees do. Or who has the rings?
When did you let them go sit on the front row (after what part of the service).
Post # 8
@ Jewel12, When the father, or whoever is giving her away, goes to sit down the preacher will let everyone else know that it is ok to sit down. That is when the attendents would sit down. As for the rings the bride and groom could each carry the other’s ring or the best man and Maid/Matron of Honor could bring the ring to the couple when it comes time for the exchange and then go sit back down. After the ceremony they would stand back up and head down the aisle for the recessional.
Post # 9
What kind of relationship do you have with your dad? I may be in the minority, but I think it’s okay to have your dad sit in the second row. If the front row is reserved for the most important people in your life and your step mom isn’t one of them then he’ll have to accept that. You don’t have to compromise because of his new marriage.
Post # 10
I guess I’m in the minority here, my mom passed away 4 years ago and I cannot even imagine my dad’s girlfriend (they’re not married) sitting in the front row at my wedding hell you’re nicer then I am since I told them in no uncertain terms that I don’t even want her there. Sorry but I’m with you on this one…tell your dad that he can sit in the front row but you’re uncomfortable with his new wife being up there in a place of honor that should be reserved for your mother. If he’d rather sit with his wife then he can but this way it’s his decision.
Post # 11
Thanks so much everyone for your input!!!!! Thank you too Frugalista for understanding exactly how I am feeling. I will talk to my dad and see what is his preference. Thanks again everyone!
Post # 12
This isn’t about the new wife. It’s about your dad. If your dad is special to you, he should be up front. I’m sorry you lost your mom, but I don’t think you can just ask that and new wife don’t sit together. Then you put your dad in this strange “her or me” position. By having her with your dad, it’s not saying she is replacing your mom. Besides, you’ve said, she’s been helpful. And it would behoove you all, if you and his new wife got long. It seems like things are OK, so far. However if you try to split them at the ceremony, things might cool.
Is your dad giving you away? From those you mentioned being in the front row, you’re talking about maybe 10 ppl. can they all sit in the front row? (Or just behind the Bridal Party. But have grandma and great aunts on the end? That way step mom can sit next to dad. But she won’t be “standing out”. Dad might have to climb over grandma, but he could probably manage. Also, I like the idea of having some kind of flower at your mom’s seat. Maybe lighting a candle.