Post # 1
So living in mostly middle class, generally casual Southern California I haven’t ever been to a wedding that was black tie or formal and people usally play fast and loose with any dress code. For reference- I’ve been to fancy concert halls for ballets and such and people will be in everything from tuxedos to jeans. We have a family wedding coming up and the website says it’s formal. The ceremony starts at 6- so it’s definitely an evening wedding- but at least the ceremony is outside and it’s in the beginning of September (which is still going to be in the mid-90s here until long after the sun goes down). Adding to my stress is the fact that we are beyond broke and can’t afford anything too extravegant but it’s my husband’s nephew so we can’t just skip the wedding.
I think I found something that would work for me. It’s a long gown with a champagne slip dress and a black sequined-lace shell over the whole thing. It’s polyester but I’m hoping the fabric is thin/flowy enough that I won’t die in the heat.
My main question is- what’s the least my husband can get away with? I assume formal (not black tie) would require a full suit, but they can’t possibly expect men to be wearing long sleeve shirts, ties and jackets in the heat, can they? Can he get away with nice slacks, long sleeve shirt, and a tie without the jacket? That’s what he wore to our own (not anywhere near formal) wedding and I’m hoping we can avoid having to buy a suit.
Post # 2
MexiPino : Is the reception outside too? If not, I would try to find some way for him to wear a suit. Is there anyone he can borrow one from, or could you check second-hand stores? Men’s Wearhouse usually has some for $99 if you can possibly swing that. Or maybe just get a jacket that would look ok with the dress pants he already has. If none of these pan out, I’m sure the nephew would rather see him there in whatever he’s wearing rather than not there at all.
Post # 3
I think he can get away without a jacket. Or, even try to spice it up with a vest but no jacket.
Post # 4
MexiPino : What is the venue? That would help. In in SoCal too. It’s hot as hell in September. I hope they have a way to cool off guests! Is it near the coast?
I say you’re fine with what he has. You can even just get a sport jacket I’d you think it’s not fancy enough. I’d go to Ross or TJMaxx which is way cheaper. Or you can buy a jacket keep it in the car in case he feels underdressed.
But I say I’ve seen cocktail attire at even formal events here. Some people will likely dress up more than others and some will be casual. I say try not to stress too much and just wear what you have if shopping for a suit or jacket is too much money.
Post # 5
sweatergal007 : Thanks. Yeah– we had our wedding (ceremony outdoors) in late October and it was still hot as hell. I’m hoping they mean “California formal” which is really just an attempt to make people know not to come in jeans. TJ Maxx is a good idea. I’ll check for coats there, but I bet he can get away without it as long as he wears nice slacks and a tie.
Post # 6
MexiPino : Look for an unlined linen jacket. They should be marked down already and will be the cooolest jacket he can wear.
Macy’s and JC Penney have them for around $40
Post # 7
julies1949 : Awesome advice. Thanks!
Post # 8
The most important thing is that you’ll be there. It’s great that you are making an effort, but please don’t feel bad about fashion. You showing up for the people you love is what matters.
I love the advice here, and I’d also suggest checking out a thrift shop or second-hand shop. There are some gems there!
Post # 9
MexiPino : I hope so too! 🙂 Good luck and have fun!