(Closed) Help with including our child in our ceremony

posted 7 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
Member
410 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

oh great idea and I will await your replies as well because I have my 16 (will be 17 at the wedding) as a groomsman and my 2yr old who will be 3 at the wedding as my ring bearer. I too will do a sand ceremony to unite us all but I love your idea of incorporating them even more. I think it’s a bit more challenging for me with the ages of mine. One is too young to get it and the other is too cool to care 🙂

Post # 5
Member
46606 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

If he is the son of the two of you, you may need to adapt some of these ideas as they may refer to step-children.

1. family medallion  or ring ceremony – the step-parent places the family medallion around the neck of the child with words such as “With this medallion, I take thee into my care to love as my own.”

2. including children in the vows

Groom: “(children’s names), I want you to know that I dearly love your mother. We have become very good friends over the weeks and months and we have learned to love each other. As you have so graciously shared this wonderful woman with me, so will I share the love I feel for her with you.

Together, we will learn much more about each other. I promise also to be fair and to be honest, to be available for you as I am for your mom, and in due time, to earn your love, respect and true friendship. I will not attempt to replace anyone, but to make a place in your hearts that is for me alone. I will be father and friend, and I will cherish my life with all of you. On this day when I marry your mom, I marry you, and I promise to love and support you as my own.”

Bride: “(children’s names), I want you to know that I dearly love your father. We have become very good friends over the weeks and months and we have learned to love each other. As you have so graciously shared this wonderful man with me, so will I share the love I feel for him with both of you. Together, we will learn much more about each other.

I promise also to be fair and to be honest, to be available for you as I am for your dad, and in due time, to earn your love, respect and true friendship. I will not attempt to replace anyone, but to make a place in your hearts that is for me alone. I will be mother and friend, and I will cherish my life with both of you. On this day when I marry your dad, I marry you, and I promise to love and support you as my own.”

The bride and groom’s children then responded to the following vows when read by the pastor:

(Children’s names), do you promise to love your mother and her new husband?

Children respond: “I do.”

Do you promise to support their marriage and your new family?

Children respond: “I do.”

Do you promise to accept the responsibility of being their children, and to encourage them, support them, and accept them just as our heavenly Father accepts us?

Children respond: “I do.”

(Children’ names), do you promise to love your father and his new wife?

Children respond: “I do.”

Do you promise to support their marriage and your new family?

Children respond: “I do.”

Do you promise to accept the responsibility of being their children, and to encourage them, support them, and accept them just as our heavenly Father accepts us?

Children respond: “I do.”

3. another version

“Before (Bride and Groom names) exchange their vows to each other, as husband and wife they have special vows to their children and their children to them. Not only are they entering into a covenant of 2 people but are uniting 2 families to one.”

The Children are called forward to stand together.

“This marriage is not just joining of (bride and groom); it is also the joining of (all children’s names) as one Christian family. (Bride and Groom), do you promise to love (children’s names) to nurture them and to protect them, to teach them and cherish them now and forever united by our Lord Jesus Christ?”

(Bride and groom) respond:” We do.”

Pastor: (Children’s Names) “Do you promise to love (bride and groom) as your parents, do you promise to respect them and cherish them now and forever as one family united by our Heavenly Father?”

Children Recite: “We Do”

Pastor says: “(Bride Groom) have gifts for the children – as their wedding rings symbolize a reminder of how their love encircles them – these bracelets are a reminder to the children-that they are also encircled in a communion of divine love as a member of this family.”

Groom places bracelets on the three oldest children. (Individually)
Bride places bracelet on youngest child.

As each bracelet is clasped, Pastor says: “Do you pledge yourself to Christ and (Child’s name.) Bride/Groom say: “I do.”

 

Post # 6
Member
116 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

i have a 7 year old daughter (she will be eight for the wedding) and we have decided that my fiance will say some “vows” to hear as well and present her with a gift of a tiffany’s necklace or bracelet. We thought this would be a good way to incorporate her in the ceremony and a way to show their bond becoming father and daughter.

Post # 7
Member
21 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I am having my soon to be husband’s 17 year old daughter as one of my bridesmaid’s. I have issues with her so I am trying my best. I think that is enough to have her as a bridesmaid. I know if I don’t I will probably look back and regret it as I do love her and am sure we will get along when she realizes her parents will never get back together and grows up a bit.

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