(Closed) Heres the list, tell me yes or no If I need to tip them

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
8353 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

  1. No
  2. Pastor; yes. Music coordinator; gift card is perfect.
  3. DJ: Yes, but I would send it to him after your wedding, so you can base it on how well he did.
  4. Photographer: Yes, but I would send it to her after your wedding, so you can base it on how well she did.
  5. No
  6. No

Post # 4
164 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

If the photographer owns the business, I don’t think you should tip.  I don’t think you’re supposed to tip the proprietor of a business.

Post # 5
2538 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

The officiant gets tipped? I had no idea.

Post # 6
652 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@TheFutureMcBride:  I don’t think it’s typical for the officiant to get tipped.  But if you are having a wedding in a church, you are usually expected to make a donation to the church as well as paying the pastor. 

Post # 7
493 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I had to give the church $600.  A portion of that money goes to the church, a portion goes to the officiant (priest), a portion goes to the music director, and then a little bit goes to the altar servers.  Because they each get part of that money, I don’t feel the need to tip them on top of it.  In fact, seeing as I’m only taking up an hour of their time they’re getting paid pretty well already!

Post # 8
652 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

What about caterers and servers?

Post # 9
1418 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@Violet Violet:  That will depend I think on who is catering and what you are already paying for…My reception venue (hotel) provides the catering and I am already going to be paying a 17% gratuity that they call a “service tax”…which is added onto my bill BEFORE tax is calculated.  RIDICULOUS.  So no, I will not be tipping the caterer!

Post # 10
5797 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

@dance: my service charge is 21% I’m with you on not tipping the caterer

Post # 11
3709 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011


1. Person planning my wedding at the hotel.  I spent 1800 to rent the place, do I need to tip her? Yes…she isn’t pocketing the $1800. I would place her in the same category as a waiter.

2. I know I need to tip the pastor, but do I need to tip the music coordinator?  I spent 350 on the church/music.  I will get our singer a gift card. No…if they aren’t actually performing at the ceremony then I wouldn’t tip.

3. DJ-It is a company and the person DJ ing it works for the company. Yes.

4. Photographer-the photog owns the company(although she has gone above and beyond so I may get her a gift card for dinner somewhere, No

5.The florist also is an independent florist. No

6.  I don’t think its customary to tip the cake person, is it? No

Post # 12
309 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Not to hijack the conversation… but, I had the same question about the following:

1. Hairstylist (owns her own company– we will not be going to her salon, she is coming to the hotel)

2.  Second hairstylist– she is being brought by the hairstylist, it sounded like she was an independant, and not an employee of the primary hairstylist.

3. Makeup artist (owns her own company, will be coming to the hotel)

I thought I didn’t need to tip any of them, since they are essentially independent contractors and will pocket 100% of what I am paying.  However, if the second hairstylist is really an employee, I guess I should tip her– but, isn’t that ackward that she’s the only one getting a tip?


Post # 14
2195 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I would say no to the limo guy.  If he owns the business, he is pocketing all the profit and has already set the price of his service as he sees fit.

Tipping culture is such a headache!

Post # 15
1079 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

The general rule I read somewhere on here is that non-owners get tipped.

My parents are giving our rabbis $500. They didn’t say anything about getting paid extra unless we didn’t join the synogogue (which we did), but my mom’s father was a rabbi and I guess he always expected to get paid.

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