Post # 1
Yes, and I am the hated fiancee in the third row at the wedding
Seriously, I am actually dreading the “rehearsal dinner”- it’s pissing me off! I know that sounds terrible, so let me give a little background…
They “dated” for like a month, then she broke it off. We started dating like a year later. A year after that, she decided maybe she made a mistake (she did! he’s wonderful!) She texts, he ignores, we all meet by chance one night, I’m polite, she tries to get him alone, he and I have to have a talk the next day over whether there are unresolved “feelings” there. There aren’t, so he agrees she’s being inappropriate and stops talking to her entirely.
Another year goes by, and now this. They have a lot of mutual friends, and he has to attend the rehearsal dinner alone- no spouses are invited, just the wedding party. She has a boyfriend now (who of course also won’t be there), but obviously relationships seem to be no obstacle. Now, I trust Fiance completely- doesn’t mean I have to be happy about this girl in a small, personal gathering with him.
He almost had a falling out with the groom trying to get me invited and saying he wouldn’t go if I couldn’t, but I told him that wasn’t necessary. I’m sure she knows about that too now. Once we get past the rehearsal dinner, the wedding will be awkward but completely bearable. I can just smile smugly and ignore her. But I am not going to enjoy this upcoming evening when he’s attending this thing.
Anyone else had a similar situation? If exes are nice, that’s one thing. That’s totally fine. I was ready to be friends! But this is a different story…
Post # 3
i feel you girl. my bf ex is a hoe so she always get the side eye from me.
Post # 4
I feel ya! My bf was engaged to his ex… and my bf’s sister is marrued to my bfs exes cousin… so I have the JOY of hearring about her and seeing her on a regular basis. Shes also a liar, told people the baby she had was my bfs (even though they brojke up 6 months before she got pregnant), she sent my bf dirty messages and has been a big pain!
Good luck! And just remember you are the bigger person AND you have the guy!
Post # 5
First off, someone should teach the bride and groom that you don’t split up married or engaged couples for a mixed party social event. Significant others should have been invited to their rehearsal dinner. Ignoring that fact, I would say don’t worry about it! I know that’s easier said than done, I wouldn’t like being in this situation either. But it sounds like your Fiance has been really open with you about the past and has told you straight up he has no remaining feelings for her, and even cut off ties to her. He has stood up for you to the groom as well, so he clearly has your back. Just trust him not to do anything that would make you uncomfortable, and make fun plans with your grilfriends the night of the rehearsal to keep your mind off it!
Post # 6
ugh…what a dreadful woman this ex is…this is not a situation I would want any woman to be in…I would just say that you have to be the bigger person here and know that your fiance loves you and only you. This woman can try whatever she wants, but honestly, it doesn’t mean that it’ll work…blow this chick out of the water and show her that you’re a better person than she is, and that’s why he’s marrying you!!
Post # 7
@Moose1209: I totally agree with your point about married/engaged couples being split up for something like this. The bride will be invited to our rehearsal dinner since her husband is one of FI’s groomsmen.
You’re all right, and thanks for the support! I know I don’t have anything to worry about, it’s just an irritating situation and I needed to vent.
Post # 8
Too funny, this weekend I was in a wedding and my ex was a Groomsmen. I was DREADING the entire thing, but not as much as FH. It actually all turned out well because no one made a big deal about it. It was a whole lot of worrying for nothing if that helps!
Post # 9
@MrsPinkPeony: That does help. I’m sure this will be no big deal. Fiance is dreading it too, he really detests everything associated with this wedding for multiple reasons but the dinner is the worst. I’ll just be much happier once the awkwardness is out of the way and this is over!
Post # 10
I just went through this in June! My FI’s ex and he were together for years though, but had been broken up for a while when he and I met. Although she has had several moments of crazy throughout our relationship, being underhanded and trying to make his family dislike me or make Fiance and I fight, but mostly we just ignore all of it. I was invited to the rehearsal dinner, but it was also fairly casual, so no big deal. At the rehearsal, they largely just avoided each other, which worked well. However, at the actual wedding, Fiance completely ignored his ex, but she did not do the same. He loves to dance to stuff like the Cupid Shuffle and the Electric Slide, while I am not a fan. So whenever he was out dancing to one of those and I wasn’t, she would go dance really close by to him and send me smirks and dirty looks. I didn’t say a word about it to anyone, but other people noticed and mentioned it to me.
Later, when he and I were away from the actual reception, she stormed over and yelled at him and then continued to say stuff under her breath to him when she passed by in the reception all night. He told me that he was angry about her yelling at him, but still just ignored her (we were both dead set on not having any drama with her during the wedding). And so on and so forth. Not to mention that the bride and groom came out of the reception to see why she was yelling at him, and I was the one who smoothed it over with them and told them not to worry about it and go have fun! Now the bride doesn’t even speak to her because of her behaviour at the wedding….
At the end of the night, it was his reaction, not hers, that mattered. He could have cared less about her or her drama, and it showed. I think if you trust him, then you don’t have anything to worry about!