he's gaming again

posted 2 years ago in Married Life
Post # 31
Member
409 posts
Helper bee

monique637 :  Bee, I understand, mine is the same way. Exactly because he is such a great person in the non-gaming time and does many nice and kind things, that I’m still around. However, in your case, you have the children and many more things to consider. It might sound harsh, but I think if you have a serious conversation with him,and he understands he risks losing his family, it might shock him back into reality. That’s a big wake up call for any father. I hope it works and things better for you and your whole family. 👍❤👍

Post # 32
Member
3210 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

monique637 :  you say aside from gaming he’s great, but your first post makes it sound like the gaming is all consuming. Which is it? How can a great guy neglect his children, lose his job to support the family, have his pregnant wife sleep in the living room etc.? He is not a great guy, sorry. 

I too question why you’d bring two more children into the world with him after seeing how deadbeat he is. 

Post # 33
Member
2844 posts
Sugar bee

Gaming can definitely be a serious addiciton. I don’t think you are overreacting to your situation in the slightest. I think that if he lapses back into that behaviour then I would suggest to him that the two of you go to therapy. If he wants to play video games it needs to be for controlled periods of time.

I broke up with my ex essentially over his gaming. There were larger issues related to it for sure, but he would neglect our relationship, his job, and his health in order to sit up gaming all night. I play video games casually for a bit of fun, but when it’s interfering in your real life it is a problem

The only problem is that he seems like he might be selfish beyond just the gaming. The fact that he expected you to stay home all weekend just so he could show his nephew his new car while he left you to look after them all – in order to participate in his relationship destroying addiction… That’s not even related to the addiction controlling his behaviour, that’s downright selfish. 

Post # 34
Member
4756 posts
Honey bee

ivanjelina :  Yes I’ve tried it several times. You can text your location with the license plate of the driver to a friend. Plus if the driver comes by and gives you a weird feeling you don’t have to get in the car. I think there’s an all women’s version that someone started but I don’t know what it’s called. I’ve been thinking of testing that one out if it comes to my area.

 

Post # 35
Member
2917 posts
Sugar bee

monique637 :  Why couldn’t he take the smaller car? Or get a lift? But then he is the sort of person who would let a  pregnant wife drive home alone so that he could stay at a party.  And he did want you and the children to sleep in the living room so he and his gaming buddies could do gaming in the bedroom near the router. So he isn’t exactly making sure that you are okay.

And not only do you have three small children aged 5, 1 and 2 months but he has three small children aged 5, 1 and 2 months.  He needs to be home spending time with them. They are his responsibility too.

My advice is to take action.  Order a taxi.  You and your children travel in the taxi and go and get your new car. Then drive home in your new car.  When you arrive home cut the plugs off all electronic devices (after unsubscribing from any gaming sites) and change the door locks. Freeze any joint bank account. Go and see a lawyer.

My point is that you don’t have to go along with everything your husband says and does.  You are right and he is wrong.

Post # 36
Member
2917 posts
Sugar bee

monique637 :  Why couldn’t he take the smaller car? Or get a lift? But then he is the sort of person who would let a  pregnant wife drive home alone so that he could stay at a party.  And he did want you and the children to sleep in the living room so he and his gaming buddies could do gaming in the bedroom near the router. So he isn’t exactly making sure that you are okay.

And not only do you have three small children aged 5, 1 and 2 months but he has three small children aged 5, 1 and 2 months.  He needs to be home spending time with them. They are his responsibility too.

My advice is to take action.  Order a taxi.  You and your children travel in the taxi and go and get your new car. Then drive home in your new car.  When you arrive home cut the plugs off all electronic devices (after unsubscribing from any gaming sites) and change the door locks. Freeze any joint bank account. Go and see a lawyer.

My point is that you don’t have to go along with everything your husband says and does.  You are right and he is wrong.

I note that this is the third time you have started a thread about your husband’s behaviour.  You don’t need to let this happen. 

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