Post # 1
Member
19 posts
Newbee
Hey Bees. So here is my story. I have been with my guy for two years. Long distance for the whole relationship. We see each other about evetwo six weeks. I am a single mom of three, he is a bit (6years) lung than I am and no kids. However, he is a workaholic!! So in the beginninlive woould be long distance for one year and he would move here. Well…. Now it’s been 2 and he tells me that there will be a job forhim here near my house sometime this year. Here is the problem… In Feb (in a non romantic and not best of moment) he proposed. No ring just the question. Of course I said yes. Then the next morning I was talking about changing my fb status and he said not to bc his mom would see it. So….I’m still hurt by his fake proposal and trying to work thru it. He said he ment it at that moment but isn’t ready till he can move here. Though we are still unsure of when that will ever be.
Bc of this act my trust vita little lost, confused and angry. But my kids love him and all and all he is a great guy. Just now I’m with no time line for anything. I just don’t want to waist my life waiting for someone who can’t commit. So I WAIT.
Post # 3
Member
1088 posts
Bumble bee
Welcome to the waiting board!
I’m sorry about what happened. Have you tried discussing a timeline with him?
Post # 4
Member
1155 posts
Bumble bee
Welcome to the Hive!
That is very frustrating and I would be hurt too by the “fake proposal” thing. Have you tried having a rational, calm discussion with him about a loose timeline? That’s the first thing I would do! He can’t read your mind and it’s important that you both be on the same page if things are going to work. Hopefully after that maybe you’ll feel better about the whole thing.
Post # 5
Member
19 posts
Newbee
Oh the discussions we have had. LOL. Yes. He has just apologized for the fact he can not give me one and that it is dependent upon his job. However at this moment I am just trying to not even talk about it (mr. bee plan) but boy it’s difficult! 🙂
Post # 6
Member
2398 posts
Buzzing bee
Hi there, Welcome! You have come to a place with very smart woman to help with good advice and support. I am sorry about what happened and I hope that you two can work it out for the better.
Post # 7
Member
1155 posts
Bumble bee
Well if you’ve already talked in-depth about marriage and your future, the only thing you can really do is Mr. Bee’s Plan. It’s very tough, but I hear it’s worth the wait 
. I have 10 weeks to go until the suspected date my SO might propose so I feel your pain! Just keep busy and focus on yourself and your kids!
Post # 8
Member
1088 posts
Bumble bee
@Dallasnkyle: But it sounds like you are more confused/frustrated by the fact that he asked and didn’t want you to say anything. It doesn’t seem like being proposed to without a ring was the problem. . .or am I confused?
Did you guys talk about why he didn’t want you to say anything (ie change your fb status)?
Post # 9
Member
19 posts
Newbee
@ChicChick: Yes I am / was very confused. Still frustrated. The no ring is no problem for me, I know when he moves here the financial situation will improve drastically and then he can buy what he really wants. When I told him it was hurtful to fake something like that he just apologized and said he meant it at the moment. However, now he wants to wait and do it right and wait for his job situation to change. He doesn’t want a long distance engagement. There really is nothing I can say anymore. It’s become nagging so I keep quiet. It effected me in a way that now I don’t really trust all he says to me. He says he wants to marry me, I doubt him. He says he will move herI, I doubt him. (he said this would only be a year LDR, on two now). BUT, I put a smile on and push through bc I understand the importance and value his job gives him. It gives him self worth. Where as my kids are mine. 🙂
Post # 10
Member
597 posts
Busy bee
@Dallasnkyle: Welcome, I’m sorry about your situation. 🙁
Member